Joke Of The Day (FAST SEX)

[LeftNutOfGowd]

So i haven't seen a joke of the day thread in a long time so here's one i heard today. So Enjoi and i hope you laugh.

Eddie wanted desperately to have sex with this really cute, really hot girl in his office... but she was dating someone else. One day Eddie got so frustrated that he went to her and said, "I'll give you $100 if you let me have sex with you..."

The girl looked at him, and then said, "NO!"

Eddie said, "I'll be real fast. I'll throw the money on the floor, you bend down and I'll finish by the time you've picked it up."

She thought for a moment and said that she would consult with her boy friend...so she called him and explained the situation. Her boyfriend says, "Ask him for $200, and pick up the money really fast..., he won't even be able to get his pants down."

She agreed and accepts the proposal.

Over half an hour goes by and the boyfriend is still waiting for his
girlfriend's call. Finally, after 45 minutes the boyfriend calls and asks, "what happened.....?" Still breathing hard, she managed to reply, "The fucker had all quarters!'"

Management lesson: Always consider a business proposition in it's entirety before agreeing to it and getting screwed !!Also this joke might work in a real life situation lol

:keke::keke::keke::keke::keke:

[Landers]

hahahaha pretty good

[revat619]

hahahahaha

[xblack240x]

Haha I remember reading this a while back on entensity. Funny joke :bigok:

[YoungGun]

Haha good one.

[aziankingz]

lol damn thats funny as fuck.. owned..

it can work in a real life situation..just use pennies instead..

[speedgod^s13]

Owned. Think I might try that at work.

[stiizy]

oh shit thats funny as hell

[aziankingz]

Owned. Think I might try that at work.

let me know how that goes or ill just read it in the news:bigok:

[azndoc]

hahahahahahaha

that was pretty funny.

+1

[DOOK]

niiiiiiice

+1

[Future240]

hahaha nice

I owe you rep for that one

[mRclARK1]

And she thought I was just gonna throw down a couple bills. :keke:

lol

[DUFFM4N]

smart....no wonder his name is eddie :keke:

[airsoft]

So I went to the doctor one day and I told him I had once broke my leg in 2 places.

He replies, well don't go back to those 2 places.

[stiizy]

smart....no wonder his name is eddie :keke:

I knew you were gonna say something like that :keke::keke::keke:

[Antihero983]

Brilliant!

[LeftNutOfGowd]

Hahaha i would have thrown some dimes make it harder to pick up and it will look like alot more money lol..

[lolatclint]

LOL omg hahaha. he said by the time u bend over ill be done

[Okinawandrifter87]

Heres one..

The inventor of the Harley Davidson motorcycle, Arthur Davidson, died and went to Heaven. At the gates St. Peter told Arthur, "Since you have been such a good man and your motorcycles have changed the world, your reward is, you can hang out with anyone you want in Heaven."

Arthur thought about it for a minute and then said , "I want to hang out with GOD." St. Peter took Arthur to the throne room and introduced him to GOD.

Arthur asked GOD, "Hey, aren't you the inventor of woman?"

GOD said, "Ah Yes"

"Well said Arthur, professional to professional, you have some major flaws in your invention.".

1. There's too much inconsistency in the front end protrusion.
2. It chatters constantly at high speeds.
3. Most of the rear ends are too soft, and wobble too much.
4. The intake is placed way too close to the exhaust.
5. And the maintenance costs are outrageous.

"Hmmmmm, you may have some good points there," replied GOD. Hold on. GOD went to his celestial computer, typed in a few words and waited for the results. The computer printed out a slip of paper and GOD read it.

"Well, it may be true that my invention is flawed, but according to these numbers, more men are riding my invention than yours."

[AznDrftr.]

oh nice.

*goes to try it*

[Antihero983]

Oh shit son!!!!

[stiizy]

haha good one Oki

[Okinawandrifter87]

haha.. domo!

[Okinawandrifter87]

Q: How many ADD kids does it take to change a light bulb?
A: Wanna go ride bikes?

[shade]

Dudes awesome! Lol.

[seesquared]

Q: How many ADD kids does it take to change a light bulb?
A: Wanna go ride bikes?

i laughed hysterically.......for a while

[1ZlowZ]

There was one I heard years ago. Let me try and remember.

There three guys at a bar talking about how they have sex with their wives, as they're sharing their stories, one all of a sudden brings up the rodeo position. The men look at him puzzled, they ask "whats the rodeo? I've never heard of that one before." The man then explains. "Rodeo is when you mount your wife, cup her breast and say 'ah these feel just like your sisters' and hang on for as long as you can. Yehaw!"

[!Zar!]

That made me lol.

Got to use that one.

[s13coupedrfter]

Here's a good one...

3 vampires walk into a bar. The bartender asks the 1st vampire, "what will it be"?
1st vampire replies,"give me a pint of blood"? So the bartender slides him a pint of blood.
Bartender looks at the 2nd vampire,"what will it be"?
2nd vampire replies,"give me a pint of blood". Bartender slides him a pint of blood.
The bartender looks at the 3rd vampire,"what will it be"?
3rd vampire replies,"give me a hot cup of water". Confused the bar tender asks,"why arnt you having a pint of blood like your friends"? The vampire reaches behind his cape and pulls out a dirty tampon and says,"I'm having tea thank you".

[qwikspool]

lol funny
+1

[driftphenom]

guy walks into a bar and says " gimme a schlitz malt liquor and a bologna sandwich" the bartender says " sir we dont carry schlitz, or bologna sandwiches" guys leaves, comes back the next day and says " gimme a schlitz malt liquor and a bologna sandwich", and again the bartender says "we dont carry schlitz, or bologna sandwitches" guys come in the third day and says the same thiing again, this time the bartender gets pissed and says" look we dont got that shit, if you keep coming in here askin for it, im gonna knock you over the head with a stick" so the guy leaves, about a week later the guy walks in to the bar, looks a t the bartender and says "gotta stick?" the bartenders like" no", so the guy says " well, let me get a schlitz malt liqour and a bologna sandwitch"

funnier in person i think

[Z33dori]

that is awesome.....

wow

[1ZlowZ]

One time at a school, the students had a subsitute teacher for a week. The first day for the teacher she sees a penis drawn on the board, OK no matter so she rubs it off. She goes in the next day and sees a bigger penis drawn on the board a little annoyed but again she rubs it off. The third day she see's an even bigger penis taking up almost all the board. She lashes out yells at the students you little perverts who ever is doing this say so right now sick minded children. Then one kid stands up and says the more the rub it the bigger it gets!

[sxe]

lol.

so this kids comes home from school and says "DADDY DADDY!! I HAD SEX WITH MY TEACHER"
so the father says " good job son, lets go buy you a bike!"
the son says "can we wait alittle while?, my butts still sore" :bigok:

[240=180]

^^^^
ahahahahahahaha