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Dark
11-24-2002, 01:19 PM
A freind of mine sent me an e-mail and this is what I got

</span><table border="0" align="center" width="95%" cellpadding="3" cellspacing="1"><tr><td>Quote </td></tr><tr><td id="QUOTE">i know the Mo in this encounter. he's a very funny guy.
be patient. it gets funnier about a page down. u'll laugh your ass off.

S



>
> A lot of horny people around the internet:
>
>
> Mo: Hello, Sweetheart. What do you look like?
>
> Sweetheart: I am wearing a red silk blouse, a miniskirt and high heels.
> I work out every day, I'm toned and perfect. My measurements are
> 36-24-36. What do you look like?
>
> Mo: I'm 6'3" and about 250 pounds. I wear glasses and I have on a pair
> of blue sweat pants I just bought from WalMart. I'm also wearing a
> T-shirt with a few spots of barbecue sauce on it from dinner ...it
> smells funny.
>
> Sweetheart: I want you. Would you like to screw me?
>
> Mo: OK
>
> Sweetheart: We're in my bedroom. There's soft music playing on the
> stereo and candles on my dresser and night table. I'm looking up into
> your eyes, smiling. My hand works its way down to your crotch and begins
> to fondle your huge, swelling bulge.
>
> Mo: I'm gulping, I'm beginning to sweat.
>
> Sweetheart: I'm pulling up your shirt and kissing your chest.
>
> Mo: Now I'm unbuttoning your blouse. My hands are trembling.
>
> Sweetheart: I'm moaning softly.
>
> Mo: I'm taking hold of your blouse and sliding it off slowly.
>
> Sweetheart: I'm throwing my head back in pleasure. The cool silk slides
> off my warm skin. I'm rubbing your bulge faster, pulling and rubbing.
>
> Mo: My hand suddenly jerks spastically and accidentally rips a hole in
> your blouse. I'm sorry.
>
> Mo: I'll pay for it.
>
> Sweetheart: Don't worry about it. I'm wearing a lacy black bra. My soft
> breasts are rising and falling, as I breath harder and harder.
>
> Mo: I'm fumbling with the clasp on your bra. I think it's stuck. Do you
> have any scissors?
>
> Sweetheart: I take your hand and kiss it softly. I'm reaching back
> undoing the clasp. The bra slides off my body. The air caresses my
> breasts. My nipples are erect for you.
>
> Mo: How did you do that? I'm picking up the bra and inspecting the
> clasp.
>
> Sweetheart: I'm arching my back. Oh baby. I just want to feel your
> tongue all over me.
>
> Mo: I'm dropping the bra. Now I'm licking your, you know, breasts.
> They're neat!
>
> Sweetheart: I'm running my fingers through your hair. Now I'm nibbling
> your ear.
>
> Mo: I suddenly sneeze. Your breasts are covered with spit and phlegm.
>
> Sweetheart: What?
>
> Mo: I'm so sorry. Really.
>
> Sweetheart: I'm wiping your phlegm off my breasts with the remains of my
> blouse.
>
> Mo: I'm taking the sopping wet blouse from you. I drop it with a plop.
>
> Sweetheart: OK. I'm pulling your sweat pants down and rubbing your hard
> tool.
>
> Mo: I'm screaming like a woman. Your hands are cold! Yeeee!
>
> Sweetheart: I'm pulling up my miniskirt. Take off my panties.
>
> Mo: I'm pulling off your panties. My tongue is going all over, in and
> out nibbling on you... umm... wait a minute.
>
> Sweetheart: What's the matter?
>
> Mo: I've got a pubic hair caught in my throat. I'm choking.
>
> Sweetheart: Are you OK?
>
> Mo: I'm having a coughing fit. I'm turning all red.
>
> Sweetheart: Can I help?
>
> Mo: I'm running to the kitchen, choking wildly. I'm fumbling through the
> cabinets, looking for a cup. Where do you keep your cups?
>
> Sweetheart: In the cabinet to the right of the sink.
>
> Mo: I'm drinking a cup of water. There, that's better.
>
> Sweetheart: Come back to me, lover.
>
> Mo: I'm washing the cup now.
>
> Sweetheart: I'm on the bed aching for you.
>
> Mo: I'm drying the cup. Now I'm putting it back in the cabinet. And now
> I'm walking back to the bedroom. Wait, it's dark, I'm lost. Where's the
> bedroom?
>
> Sweetheart: Last door on the left at the end of the hall.
>
> Mo: I found it.
>
> Sweetheart: I'm tuggin' off your pants. I'm moaning. I want you so
> badly.
>
> Mo: Me too.
>
> Sweetheart: Your pants are off. I kiss you passionately - our naked
> bodies pressing each other.
>
> Mo: Your face is pushing my glasses into my face. It hurts.
>
> Sweetheart: Why don't you take off your glasses?
>
> Mo: OK, but I can't see very well without them. I place the glasses on
> the night table.
>
> Sweetheart: I'm bending over the bed. Give it to me, baby!
>
> Mo: I have to pee. I'm fumbling my way blindly across the room and
> toward the bathroom.
>
> Sweetheart: Hurry back, lover.
>
> Mo: I find the bathroom and it's dark. I'm feeling around for the
> toilet. I lift the lid.
>
> Sweetheart: I'm waiting eagerly for your return.
>
> ....
>
> Mo: I'm done going. I'm feeling around for the flush handle, but I can't
> find it. Uh-oh!
>
> Sweetheart: What's the matter now?
>
> Mo: I've realized that I've peed into your laundry basket. Sorry again.
> I'm walking back to the bedroom now, blindly feeling my way.
>
> Sweetheart: Mmm, yes. Come on.
>
> Mo: OK, now I'm going to put my... you know... thing... in your... you
> know... woman's thing.
>
> Sweetheart: Yes! Do it, baby! Do it!
>
> Mo: I'm touching your smooth butt. It feels so nice. I kiss your neck.
> Umm, I'm having a little trouble here.
>
> Sweetheart: I'm moving my ass back and forth, moaning. I can't stand it
> another second! Slide in! Screw me now!
>
> Mo: I'm flaccid.
>
> Sweetheart: What?
>
> Mo: I'm limp. I can't sustain an erection.
>
> Sweetheart: I'm standing up and turning around; an incredulous look on
> my face.
>
> Mo: I'm shrugging with a sad look on my face, my weiner all floppy. I'm
> going to get my glasses and see what's wrong.
>
> Sweetheart: No, never mind. I'm getting dressed. I'm putting on my
> underwear. Now I'm putting on my wet nasty blouse.
>
> Mo: No wait! Now I'm squinting, trying to find the night table. I'm
> feeling along the dresser, knocking over cans of hair spray, picture
> frames and your candles.
>
> Sweetheart: I'm buttoning my blouse. Now I'm putting on my shoes.
>
> Mo: I've found my glasses. I'm putting them on. My God! One of our
> candles fell on the curtain. The curtain is on fire! I'm pointing at it,
> a shocked look on my face.
>
> Sweetheart: Go to hell. I'm logging off, you loser!
>
> Mo: Now the carpet is on fire! You're burning.
>
> Sweetheart: (logged off)</td></tr></table><span id='postcolor'>

&nbsp;<img src="http://www.zilvia.net/f/iB_html/non-cgi/emoticons/tounge.gif" border="0" valign="absmiddle" alt=':p'> &nbsp;<img src="http://www.zilvia.net/f/iB_html/non-cgi/emoticons/smile.gif" border="0" valign="absmiddle" alt=':)'> &nbsp;<img src="http://www.zilvia.net/f/iB_html/non-cgi/emoticons/biggrin.gif" border="0" valign="absmiddle" alt=':D'> &nbsp;<img src="http://www.zilvia.net/f/iB_html/non-cgi/emoticons/laugh.gif" border="0" valign="absmiddle" alt=':laugh:'>

-E-
11-24-2002, 01:32 PM
<img src="http://www.zilvia.net/f/iB_html/non-cgi/emoticons/laugh.gif" border="0" valign="absmiddle" alt=':laugh:'> &nbsp;<img src="http://www.zilvia.net/f/iB_html/non-cgi/emoticons/laugh.gif" border="0" valign="absmiddle" alt=':laugh:'>

Nerfdude
11-24-2002, 01:56 PM
rofl! beautiful.

Jeff240sx
11-24-2002, 02:58 PM
Wow! &nbsp;That was funny shit! &nbsp;I was thinking I was gonna have to censor it, too <img src="http://www.zilvia.net/f/iB_html/non-cgi/emoticons/hehe.gif" border="0" valign="absmiddle" alt=':hehe:'> . &nbsp;LOL!
-Jeff

whateverjames
11-24-2002, 03:46 PM
LOL. then she has the nerve to call him a loser.

SilviaDriver
11-24-2002, 05:52 PM
hahaha <img src="http://www.zilvia.net/f/iB_html/non-cgi/emoticons/laugh.gif" border="0" valign="absmiddle" alt=':laugh:'> funny shit, he went limp!

Kareem
11-24-2002, 06:07 PM
<img src="http://www.zilvia.net/f/iB_html/non-cgi/emoticons/hehe.gif" border="0" valign="absmiddle" alt=':hehe:'> That's hilarious. <img src="http://www.zilvia.net/f/iB_html/non-cgi/emoticons/laugh.gif" border="0" valign="absmiddle" alt=':laugh:'>

xS1LV1Ax
11-24-2002, 06:55 PM
<img src="http://www.zilvia.net/f/iB_html/non-cgi/emoticons/laugh.gif" border="0" valign="absmiddle" alt=':laugh:'> good stuff <img src="http://www.zilvia.net/f/iB_html/non-cgi/emoticons/laugh.gif" border="0" valign="absmiddle" alt=':laugh:'>

SimpleS14
11-24-2002, 08:09 PM
<img src="http://www.zilvia.net/f/iB_html/non-cgi/emoticons/laugh.gif" border="0" valign="absmiddle" alt=':laugh:'> &nbsp;<img src="http://www.zilvia.net/f/iB_html/non-cgi/emoticons/laugh.gif" border="0" valign="absmiddle" alt=':laugh:'> &nbsp;<img src="http://www.zilvia.net/f/iB_html/non-cgi/emoticons/laugh.gif" border="0" valign="absmiddle" alt=':laugh:'>

That's really funny &nbsp;<img src="http://www.zilvia.net/f/iB_html/non-cgi/emoticons/biggrin.gif" border="0" valign="absmiddle" alt=':D'>

ZBoy
11-25-2002, 01:34 AM
DAMNIT who recorded me talking on the phone that one night.......

SR20Fastback
11-25-2002, 01:38 AM
My god, that was the funniest thing I've read in weeks. &nbsp;<img src="http://www.zilvia.net/f/iB_html/non-cgi/emoticons/laugh.gif" border="0" valign="absmiddle" alt=':laugh:'> &nbsp;<img src="http://www.zilvia.net/f/iB_html/non-cgi/emoticons/biggrin.gif" border="0" valign="absmiddle" alt=':D'>

sanmiam
11-25-2002, 05:01 AM
I remember reading that in high school, it is as funny now as it was then

jyt747
11-25-2002, 05:42 PM
that's the funniest thing i've ever read... it was tough not to bust out laughing in my office &nbsp;<img src="http://www.zilvia.net/f/iB_html/non-cgi/emoticons/laugh.gif" border="0" valign="absmiddle" alt=':laugh:'>

Chew Slice
11-26-2002, 12:41 AM
hahaha, yeah dude, that guys hilarious!!!! <img src="http://www.zilvia.net/f/iB_html/non-cgi/emoticons/baaa.gif" border="0" valign="absmiddle" alt=':baaa:'>

X-Iceman
11-26-2002, 01:34 PM
LOL OMG!! &nbsp;<img src="http://www.zilvia.net/f/iB_html/non-cgi/emoticons/biggrin.gif" border="0" valign="absmiddle" alt=':D'> &nbsp;bahahaha, that is soooo goin to be one of my friends. ROFL

gabossie
11-27-2002, 03:12 AM
HAHA, My roomate thinks I'm high cause I'm laughing so loud. HAHA.

madwilly814
11-29-2002, 09:28 AM
dude you think thats funny...... i heard an audio file of that years ago on the Kirk Mark and Lopez CD. &nbsp;they have a morning show on a radio station in baltimore, and they release a cd every once in a while and that was on one a few years back. &nbsp;search for it on kazaa or winmx..... kirk mark and lopez - cyber sex

240SxTYLE
11-29-2002, 11:47 PM
that is probably the funniest thing i've ever seen on the internet... holy &nbsp;<img src="http://www.zilvia.net/f/iB_html/non-cgi/emoticons/hehe.gif" border="0" valign="absmiddle" alt=':hehe:'> &nbsp;<img src="http://www.zilvia.net/f/iB_html/non-cgi/emoticons/biggrin.gif" border="0" valign="absmiddle" alt=':D'> &nbsp;<img src="http://www.zilvia.net/f/iB_html/non-cgi/emoticons/thumbs-up.gif" border="0" valign="absmiddle" alt=':thumbsup:'>