Remember that text message from last night? - Zilvia.net Forums | Nissan 240SX (Silvia) and Z (Fairlady) Car Forum

**ThatGuy** · 04-25-2009, 05:50 PM

Well, somebody remembers it...

Quote:

(617): Did you hit it?
(616): Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.

Quote:

(972): Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
(469): Ya, why?
(972): We should try that some time.

Quote:

(718): There's a dildo in the cheerios box here...

Quote:

(901): I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
(813): sounds like you understand them just fine

Quote:

(755): How many nights a week you wake up with sticky boxers cause you were dreaming of Clay Aiken? Your wife mad?

Quote:

(970): Drinking non-alcoholic beer is like going down on your cousin.
(970): Sure it tastes the same, but it ain't right.

I've been laughing for the last 20 mins off these things.
texts from last night

BustedS13 · 04-25-2009, 05:59 PM

Quote:

(805): Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
(1-805): Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.

HA HA HA SO REAL

there should be a voting system in place to shame the fake ones! >: (

Quote:

(207): saw "Pah-jure" lube. Thought of you. Wearing the same clothes to work tomorrow.
(513): I stayed in, ate a pint of Hagen daas and watched a movie about aids. Soooooooo single.

iHeartTheTouge · 04-25-2009, 07:58 PM

i just read the whole page, my day doesnt suck anymore. maybe it does, its 10pm and i'm in my jammies.

KoukiMonsta · 04-25-2009, 08:28 PM

i love that site lol

C. Senor · 04-25-2009, 08:50 PM

Quote:

(917): Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
(212): Vagina

LMAO! this made me freakin laugh. that site is awesome.

Bubbles · 04-25-2009, 11:48 PM

So far the Tijuana one made me laugh the most.

That site definitely rules though.

MunsonAuto · 04-26-2009, 01:30 AM

Good find...I've gone through the entire main page already...working on the march page now haha.

Freddy · 04-26-2009, 01:55 AM

Quote:

(202): first missing my period. then crying at the clinic... but why?
(408): we had sex 3 months ago. you missed your period 2 weeks ago. but nice try.

zing!!!!!!

deolio · 04-26-2009, 02:16 AM

why must the internet have so many ways to waste my time!?

zenki.life · 04-26-2009, 02:53 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by deolio

why must the internet have so many ways to waste my time!?

so true. first zilvia(not really but i do spend way to much time on here) then ebay(yes i ebay!) then all those crazy random sites that get you addicted till it becomes....oh look 1:52 AM and still not in bed. ok im going to bed now!

Quote:

(303): You picked a bad night to stay in. ____ caught her hair on fire in ____'s birthday cake.
(303): She had to stop drop and roll while two other girls beat the flames out. She might have a black eye

*DALAZ_68* · 04-26-2009, 03:00 AM

Quote:

(859): I feel like death. Did you die last night?
(305): Nope. Ready for round 2. Fiesta!
(859): unreal. Greatest comeback since Jesus

FUCKING WIN

Quote:

440): I love you
(720): are you drunk
(440): yes but I def love you, we should get married
(720): But I'm Jewish
(440): embrace Jesus

cant.stop.laughing

***Future240*** · 04-26-2009, 10:25 AM

fail blog, fml, and now this, sigh....................

**ThatGuy** · 04-26-2009, 02:39 PM

Quote:

(586): I can't disclose who, but one time I called someone, they didn't pick up, and immediately texted back 'will call later, masturbating'
(586): I thought that was really considerate

MunsonAuto · 04-26-2009, 11:37 PM

baahahahahaha...one of my favorites so far:
(925): I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
(713): Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...

(248): toast her oven
(1-248): toast her strudel
(248): inspect her gadget

deolio · 04-27-2009, 01:28 AM

(443): sorry about last night, sometimes people just get drunk and have sex witht heir friends
(336): I know, I was there.

(908): If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
(1-908): You dont have to pay it.
(908): I'm going to jail.

winnar

SochBAT · 05-20-2009, 02:35 PM

Jail > debt.

Not from the site, but i got a random one from a chick friend.

Verbatim!

"i'm soo drunfkk. Want pics of me chooochie?"
"Fuck, i shat my pants?"

then got a drunk call. So much win/fail.

smink · 05-20-2009, 02:58 PM

(404): Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
(310): So you didn't like Bolt?

My life makes sense...

dynamicck · 05-20-2009, 03:45 PM

(209): dude, you're never picky with who you hook up with, have a little dignity
(1-209): nah man, chicks are like pokemon, gotta catch \'em all

LOL

smink · 05-20-2009, 04:10 PM

(413): I just woke up in the 4th floor lounge at 5:30AM with my ipod on to springsteen and a condom on

(206): I just tried to pick my 105-lb puppy up and accidentally fingered its asshole
(425): There are some things we keep to ourselves Brian

(314): I found the orange juice, it was hiding in the vodka...trickster.

(509): My dream in life is to scissor with Ellen. I don't care if I've got a dick. I'll make it work.

(406): Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.

Killa_D · 05-20-2009, 04:21 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by dynamicck

(209): dude, you're never picky with who you hook up with, have a little dignity
(1-209): nah man, chicks are like pokemon, gotta catch \'em all

LOL

best one lol

flip3d · 05-20-2009, 06:07 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by smink

(206): I just tried to pick my 105-lb puppy up and accidentally fingered its asshole
(425): There are some things we keep to ourselves Brian

man, i LOL'd so hard @ this.

tricky_ab · 05-20-2009, 06:59 PM

Quote:

(405): Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
(918): You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
(405): I wish there were wingman of the year awards.

Chalk full of win right here!!!

blasting_speed · 05-20-2009, 11:05 PM

^^^^^^^^^^
Wow that's sick.

razmus · 05-21-2009, 09:44 AM

(214): I want to touch your soul through your body...with my penis...
(1-214): Mike i'm at church right now...

(330): Someone took a freaking dump on a roll of toilet paper. Next to the toilet. No shit in the toilet. Just on the roll of toilet paper.

(914): omg so im topless lying on my bed and i forgot my nail clippers are on my bed and i just leaned forward and the nail clipper closed. on my nipple. ouch

856): a very overweight girl in the ER just said she trippped over the invisible wii jump rope and fell

314): So I went on a date with this girl...and whos our waitress? My girlfriend got a second job she didn't tell me about to afford my bday present.

603): not only are you not the girl i fell in love with, but from the looks of it, you ate

Best site ever... hahahaha

tricky_ab · 05-21-2009, 11:20 AM

Quote:

(403): you know whats awesome about this morning. A suprise visit from my dad at 7:30 am. There was a pair of heels on the lawn and a girl sleeping in just her underwear on the floor of my living room. He either thinks im a champion or a total fuck up. I'm thinking fuck up but im hoping champion.

Quote:

(770): Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
(404): Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
(770): Fuck. Wron person. But yea

Quote:

(630): Britney fell asleep on the couch in the foier, got up stripped then pissed on the floor. Then got dressed and went to sleep in it. Also downstairs toilet clogged. Not me. I will be gone by the time you get home from work. Have fun.

Now I have my co workers looking at me like I'm crazy since I'm laughing so hard...

iwishiwas-all* · 05-21-2009, 11:51 AM

(843): the red head has a bf
(1-843): just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score

(281): How do you jack off and text at the same time?
(1-281): On my iPhone they have an app for that

Blurryeyes · 05-21-2009, 12:06 PM

(407): i went to disney world today with my friends, met snow white, then saw her later at a bar. she is naked next to me in her bed, passwed out. when you wish upon a star...

This made me lol

Flicktitty · 05-21-2009, 12:47 PM

awesome site!

(910): wow wtf my bar tab was 80 dollars
(910): IT WAS DOLLAR BEER NIGHT

Somnambulist · 05-21-2009, 01:11 PM

Hahahahaha

(813): I slept walked to the toilet and woke up pooping. Easily one of the most disorienting events of my life.

ravinaziankid · 05-21-2009, 01:36 PM

I LOLed at this

(323): You got in a fight last night?
(818): Yeah! Some dude in the bathroom...he was standing there and I notice he's got the same shirt as me on so I'm like...dude you should have called me, we look like idiots...he didn't say anything...so i got pissed and hit him...completely decimated and my hand was all bloody and covered with glass afterward...weird dude, never saw him again that night or since.
(323): Um...Did this guy happen to look almost exactly like you?

04-25-2009, 07:58 PM	#3
iHeartTheTouge Zilvia Addict Join Date: Aug 2006 Location: Glen Allen, VA Age: 32 Posts: 602 Trader Rating: (6) Feedback Score: 6 reviews	i just read the whole page, my day doesnt suck anymore. maybe it does, its 10pm and i'm in my jammies. __________________ Slide 'n Hide -'72 240z LS1 project

04-25-2009, 11:48 PM	#6
Bubbles Post Whore! Join Date: Dec 2007 Location: Location, Location. Posts: 3,320 Trader Rating: (2) Feedback Score: 2 reviews	So far the Tijuana one made me laugh the most. That site definitely rules though. __________________ For all the world knows, my vagina could be moist with desire as we speak.

04-26-2009, 01:30 AM	#7
MunsonAuto Zilvia Member Join Date: Oct 2007 Location: Vermont Age: 30 Posts: 287 Trader Rating: (0) Feedback Score: 0 reviews	Good find...I've gone through the entire main page already...working on the march page now haha. __________________ www.tannermunsondrifting.com

04-26-2009, 02:16 AM	#9
deolio Post Whore! Join Date: Mar 2007 Location: Sacramento, CA Age: 32 Posts: 4,573 Trader Rating: (13) Rides Gallery: deolio Feedback Score: 13 reviews	why must the internet have so many ways to waste my time!? __________________

04-26-2009, 11:37 PM	#14
MunsonAuto Zilvia Member Join Date: Oct 2007 Location: Vermont Age: 30 Posts: 287 Trader Rating: (0) Feedback Score: 0 reviews	baahahahahaha...one of my favorites so far: (925): I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night. (713): Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry... (248): toast her oven (1-248): toast her strudel (248): inspect her gadget __________________ www.tannermunsondrifting.com

04-25-2009, 08:28 PM	#4
KoukiMonsta Nissanaholic! Join Date: Mar 2009 Location: NC Posts: 1,969 Trader Rating: (23) Feedback Score: 23 reviews	i love that site lol

04-27-2009, 01:28 AM	#15
deolio Post Whore! Join Date: Mar 2007 Location: Sacramento, CA Age: 32 Posts: 4,573 Trader Rating: (13) Rides Gallery: deolio Feedback Score: 13 reviews	(443): sorry about last night, sometimes people just get drunk and have sex witht heir friends (336): I know, I was there. (908): If I go to jail what happens to my debt? (1-908): You dont have to pay it. (908): I'm going to jail. winnar __________________

05-20-2009, 02:35 PM	#16
SochBAT Post Whore! Join Date: Dec 2004 Location: Abilene, TX Age: 35 Posts: 6,428 Trader Rating: (9) Rides Gallery: SochBAT Feedback Score: 9 reviews	Jail > debt. Not from the site, but i got a random one from a chick friend. Verbatim! "i'm soo drunfkk. Want pics of me chooochie?" "Fuck, i shat my pants?" then got a drunk call. So much win/fail.

05-20-2009, 02:58 PM	#17
smink Zilvia Member Join Date: Feb 2009 Location: wv Age: 34 Posts: 176 Trader Rating: (11) Feedback Score: 11 reviews	(404): Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later. (310): So you didn't like Bolt? My life makes sense...

05-20-2009, 03:45 PM	#18
dynamicck Zilvia Junkie Join Date: Oct 2007 Location: HB Posts: 406 Trader Rating: (4) Feedback Score: 4 reviews	(209): dude, you're never picky with who you hook up with, have a little dignity (1-209): nah man, chicks are like pokemon, gotta catch \'em all LOL

05-20-2009, 04:10 PM	#19
smink Zilvia Member Join Date: Feb 2009 Location: wv Age: 34 Posts: 176 Trader Rating: (11) Feedback Score: 11 reviews	(413): I just woke up in the 4th floor lounge at 5:30AM with my ipod on to springsteen and a condom on (206): I just tried to pick my 105-lb puppy up and accidentally fingered its asshole (425): There are some things we keep to ourselves Brian (314): I found the orange juice, it was hiding in the vodka...trickster. (509): My dream in life is to scissor with Ellen. I don't care if I've got a dick. I'll make it work. (406): Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.

05-20-2009, 11:05 PM	#23
blasting_speed Post Whore! Join Date: Jan 2008 Location: Treno di mezzanotte di amore Posts: 2,593 Trader Rating: (8) Feedback Score: 8 reviews	^^^^^^^^^^ Wow that's sick. __________________

05-21-2009, 09:44 AM	#24
razmus Zilvia Junkie Join Date: Mar 2007 Location: VA/Madrid Age: 32 Posts: 390 Trader Rating: (7) Feedback Score: 7 reviews	(214): I want to touch your soul through your body...with my penis... (1-214): Mike i'm at church right now... (330): Someone took a freaking dump on a roll of toilet paper. Next to the toilet. No shit in the toilet. Just on the roll of toilet paper. (914): omg so im topless lying on my bed and i forgot my nail clippers are on my bed and i just leaned forward and the nail clipper closed. on my nipple. ouch 856): a very overweight girl in the ER just said she trippped over the invisible wii jump rope and fell 314): So I went on a date with this girl...and whos our waitress? My girlfriend got a second job she didn't tell me about to afford my bday present. 603): not only are you not the girl i fell in love with, but from the looks of it, you ate Best site ever... hahahaha

05-21-2009, 11:51 AM	#26
iwishiwas-all* Nissanaholic! Join Date: Mar 2004 Location: Oxford, UK/Miami Age: 33 Posts: 1,710 Trader Rating: (2) Rides Gallery: iwishiwas-all* Feedback Score: 2 reviews	(843): the red head has a bf (1-843): just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score (281): How do you jack off and text at the same time? (1-281): On my iPhone they have an app for that __________________ IG @gabednconfused https://www.youtube.com/user/gabedm

05-21-2009, 12:06 PM	#27
Blurryeyes Zilvia Junkie Join Date: Mar 2007 Location: Guadalajara, Mexico Age: 38 Posts: 364 Trader Rating: (1) Feedback Score: 1 reviews	(407): i went to disney world today with my friends, met snow white, then saw her later at a bar. she is naked next to me in her bed, passwed out. when you wish upon a star... This made me lol __________________

05-21-2009, 12:47 PM	#28
Flicktitty Post Whore! Join Date: Apr 2007 Location: Wisconsin Age: 34 Posts: 3,685 Trader Rating: (13) Feedback Score: 13 reviews	awesome site! (910): wow wtf my bar tab was 80 dollars (910): IT WAS DOLLAR BEER NIGHT __________________ 2JZ-GTE Swapped S13 Coupe - 1994 Supra Turbo

05-21-2009, 01:11 PM	#29
Somnambulist Zilvia Junkie Join Date: Jan 2008 Location: Cincinnati, Ohio Posts: 596 Trader Rating: (5) Feedback Score: 5 reviews	Hahahahaha (813): I slept walked to the toilet and woke up pooping. Easily one of the most disorienting events of my life.

05-21-2009, 01:36 PM	#30
ravinaziankid Zilvia Junkie Join Date: Dec 2007 Location: NYC Age: 38 Posts: 394 Trader Rating: (0) Feedback Score: 0 reviews	I LOLed at this (323): You got in a fight last night? (818): Yeah! Some dude in the bathroom...he was standing there and I notice he's got the same shirt as me on so I'm like...dude you should have called me, we look like idiots...he didn't say anything...so i got pissed and hit him...completely decimated and my hand was all bloody and covered with glass afterward...weird dude, never saw him again that night or since. (323): Um...Did this guy happen to look almost exactly like you?

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