I need some advice

[mastaflash05]

Im facing an internal conflict. Im 17, and a jr. in high school. I have been going out with this girl for 3 years and I broke up with her tonight. she, of course, is realy upset about it. Im realy torn with my feelings. I realy care about this girl, and dont want to lose her, but it just doesnt seem right to have such a serious relationship, and to only have one g/f through high school. she is realy the only girlfriend that I have had. I would like to be able to go out with other girls, but I dont want to regret breaking up with the one I have. I also dont want to see her with another guy. I dont know if my reasons for the breakup are justifiable. I just wish there was someone who could tell me what to do in life. this whole growing up, and making life decisions is hard. I just dont know what to do.

if any of you could share some words of wisdom or some experiances, that might help. Im lost.

[Sil Beer S13]

Dont mess with a good thing, but now its too late for that. It's just high school man dont worry. It's okay that you want to date other people. Your to young to get married anyways. Your emotions will calm down, but it will take time for the both of you. Dont try to force a friendship, it will only push her away. Just let things die down and see what happens who know's it may have been for the better. Also dont let anyone TELL you what to do in life. Take words in consideration, but the final call is yours. Live your life the way you want. Not the way others want you to live.

I hope this helps in anyway.

[TheSnail]

Dont listen to Penguin, you need her. Think about some Joe Shmoe beatin that ass, while your the one thats supposed to pop the cherry (If you hadnt already) how many people do you knoe marry there highschool sweetheart? Alot, right? But I guess she can live the rest of her life with Jimmy... And you can take the chance of being with a Heffer for life... I met my girl in 10th grade and 6years later, I couldnt live with out her, I know what your talking about , and what your going though. So nor you get back with her or you get rid of her for good, and if she likes some one else, get rid of them too.. Wish you the best. -Snail

[stealthj]

im 17 too, well, i turned 18 like last week, kinda in the same situation as you, cept i got expelled form hgih school, .....but thats worse, cuz there are a WHOLE lot of other girls in college,

but anyways, i say stay with her, but remember that even the slightest thing she does to hurt you or "mess you up" or anything just end it, cuz at this age its not worth it for us to have to go through that

we at this age have to focus on our education and getting our shit done, if we have a GF, thats great, u know whatever, but when they hassle you, and you guys start fighting and shit, end it fast...but if you guys are cool now, just let it flow man know what i mean?? i can go on and on about stuff but im kinna lazy lol...

[Jeff240sx]

Hmm.. 21 and I'm an "older" member.
I did this.. except I had 2 girls 8-10th grade, and 11-freshman year of college. The first one was psycho and I didn't really care. The second one I really would have stayed with, but I moved to college and she stayed in HS. I met someone else in college (my current gf) so I broke it off. It really sucked hearing about how many people she fucked and how she became a druggie booze-whore, because I still had feelings for her.. just fell for someone else. I really say get back together with her. First the natural male jealousy will kill you, and second.. who cares how many people you slept with? If you score once, you're good in my book. Unless the sex is aweful and you can't stand her, stay with it until you break up in heated arguement. Then you wish she caught herpes and met a gangster bf. Breaking up when you still have feelings over stupid ideologys pushed on you from tv and movies and friends in HS is not a good thing.
Get back together with her because you're bieng a male. It's our greatest downfall.
-Jeff

[mastaflash05]

its not hust that. she is realy attatched to me, and i dont have as stong of feelings for her. she has made it so that i am her life. sometimes it seems like we are still together only because we have been together for so long. sort of like the old married couple that dont want to be maried but what else do that have? hell IDk i might wake up tomorrow and get my priorities straight, and realise something i dont tonight.

[CreAziaN]

I'm 18 and I went through the same thing when I was 17. I thought I wanted my freedom, but during the time we were apart, I realized that I made the wrong choice. Fortunately, we're still together right now (2 years 7 months) and we're doing great. College is slowly creeping up and we're not sure what we're going to do. My advice to you is that you try to salvage the relationship unless you REALLY feel like you'd be happier with someone else

[nokeone]

do like Jeff did...keep her around until you find someone better..(i know you didn't "really" do this..lol..but it's a good example)...selfish?..yes...but it's the only way to ensure that you take care of yourself..trust me..worrying about others when you are 17, when you have 10million other things in your life to occupy your thoughts, is not a good thing...i know it's a total asshole perspective...but what can ya do..you're 17...you have a lifetime of girls...don't stress it...and if she is totally overbearing and making you feel like she wants your time 24/7 then just slowly chill it out...make plans with friends...explain to her that you just want some guy time...tell her you will appreciate her more if she isn't always with you...make sure you tell it to her in words she wants to hear, though...mix in compliments of how much you enjoy time with her but you also want to have time with your friends...it will give you two more to talk about anyway...it'll make the time you do spend together more special because it wont be so routine...

and honestly...the best thing you can do is to simply stay true to yourself...do what makes you feel the best in your heart...because in the end you only HAVE to live with yourself and your decisions...no one else...make sure they are the right ones for you...or you will regret it...and you will resent her down the line as the cause of those feelings inside yourself...

i had a g/f when i went off to college...all in love and crap...completely ruined my freshman and half of my sophomore year...so much stress...so much distance...it's just not worth it...

so yeah, to sum up my ramblings...

get back together...but let her know how you honestly feel...make sure she understands you need to chill it out a bit...if she can deal, and can change, and wants to make it work then GREAT..you have a good girl there...if not...then she wasn't who you really wanted anyway...because it would NEVER last through college like that...it's impossible...too much temptation...too many other people you will want to explore friendships with...and if she is the type to not allow it...it'll only create strife...

follow your heart as interpreted by your rational mind..;)..you'll be alright..



edit: i'm 25, i've been engaged, been in numerous relationships, had more then enough girls for 2 lifetimes..lol..and it all comes down to the stuff i said...so i'm not just talking out of my ass...

take it as you will...

[mastaflash05]

i think im going to wait it out a little while, and see what goes on. she will still be around in a month, so ill see how it goes and if i do realise i made a mistake i will try to change it. but if anything i just hope she at least realises tat this is not going to last forever.

[plan b]

Hmm.. 21 and I'm an "older" member.
I did this.. except I had 2 girls 8-10th grade, and 11-freshman year of college. The first one was psycho and I didn't really care. The second one I really would have stayed with, but I moved to college and she stayed in HS. I met someone else in college (my current gf) so I broke it off. It really sucked hearing about how many people she fucked and how she became a druggie booze-whore, because I still had feelings for her.. just fell for someone else. I really say get back together with her. First the natural male jealousy will kill you, and second.. who cares how many people you slept with? If you score once, you're good in my book. Unless the sex is aweful and you can't stand her, stay with it until you break up in heated arguement. Then you wish she caught herpes and met a gangster bf. Breaking up when you still have feelings over stupid ideologys pushed on you from tv and movies and friends in HS is not a good thing.
Get back together with her because you're bieng a male. It's our greatest downfall.
-Jeff


^ he is right listen to him... dont be a newb, your listening to bullshit spewed at you from tv and friends- they dont know shit, they are the same age as you what makes them anything to comment on what you should do with you life?

youve got a good thing with the girl dont destroy it. while other guys are out there, looking for all the girls that they get to bang...your at home with that one banging already, youve got the upper hand.

you win, go call her and tell her you love her.

[Ghettokracker71]

I have been dating this girl for 1 year and 7 months currently,and I would die if we ever broke up...sorry to read about that and hope everything works out.

[S14Speed997]

Im 24, and I had one girlfriend for 8 years...She was the love of my life from when i was 15 to 23......And I will tell you this, DATE OTHER PEOPLE!....Its the only way to find out if she is/was the one for you...If you stay with her, and get married, you will always wonder " what if i dated other chicks in high school"

If your girl is the one, it will work out.....you broke up with her for a reason, so stick with your gut instinct, and go see what else is out there.

I have dated/gone out with a bunch of ladies since my serious girlfriend, and I wish I did it a LONG time ago!

Eric

[Var]

if she was givin up the muffin keep her as backup, friends with benifits(doesnt work all the time though)

[mastaflash05]

well i think im following some of your guys' advice to not mess up a good thing. shes a great girl and im glad i have her. i shouldnt worry about going out with other people if i have a great girl already. i called her today and it was nice to talk to her. i guess its like an annoying pet that you get rid of, but realise you liked it more when it was gone.

but i kind of have another problem. im on spring break right now and i drank a couple of times(dont need dad speeches i know the wrongs.) and if she did that i would be realy pissed off. i would like to do what i want. ill just tell her that she can go out and have a good time if im going to. i guess we are both jelouse, and dont trust each other as much as we should. ill just see how it goes i guess. i guess i can just do what i want and if she realises im not right for her anymore she will break it off. people change.

[stealthj]

well i think im following some of your guys' advice to not mess up a good thing. shes a great girl and im glad i have her. i shouldnt worry about going out with other people if i have a great girl already. i called her today and it was nice to talk to her. i guess its like an annoying pet that you get rid of, but realise you liked it more when it was gone.

but i kind of have another problem. im on spring break right now and i drank a couple of times(dont need dad speeches i know the wrongs.) and if she did that i would be realy pissed off. i would like to do what i want. ill just tell her that she can go out and have a good time if im going to. i guess we are both jelouse, and dont trust each other as much as we should. ill just see how it goes i guess. i guess i can just do what i want and if she realises im not right for her anymore she will break it off. people change.
high school drama....

[mastaflash05]

yeah man isnt it the greatest? we got back together. i realised that i was being stupid and didnt have my priorities straight.

[CleanS14]

you will realize after you leave HS and turn 18 that you should in fact see other people... your priorities shouldn't include a girl unless you're married to her... there's millions out there... you gotta taste the different flavors to find out which one you like the best man... and by eating the same shit all the time you're gonna get full and move on to something different sooner or later...

Oh and another thing... your gf doesn't know what she wants man... females are the most confused creatures on earth!!! They can never make up their mind... and they're so easy to manipulate... she will change eventually...

Kevin's right... HS drama lol!!!

[mastaflash05]

10-4 guys, thanks for the help. it will work out.