Happy 70th Birthday to Chuck Norris! [Archive] - Zilvia.net Forums | Nissan 240SX (Silvia) and Z (Fairlady) Car Forum

no slide

03-10-2010, 02:51 PM

Chuck Norris doesn't turn 70. 70 turns Chuck Norris.
lol. just for kicks i was looking up some chuck norris facts.

Chuck Norris does not need a twitter. He is already following you

DALAZ_68

03-10-2010, 02:53 PM

jesus can walk on water...but chuck norris can swim thru land...

on the real, happy birthday to him...crazyness

jekai

03-10-2010, 02:53 PM

chuck norris doesn't take showers, he rides a 9 ft grizzly bear through a car wash

fckillerbee

03-10-2010, 04:07 PM

chuck norris doesn't DO pushups....He's pushing up the world.

DrftSLowHomIe!!

03-10-2010, 04:26 PM

Chuck Norris breaks someone else's leg for good luck

im gonna go buy a Total gym now cuz its his B-day.

ADiamond240sx

03-10-2010, 05:38 PM

Chuck Norris's tears cure cancer.... Its too bad he doesn't cry.

MisawaJason

03-10-2010, 06:13 PM

There is no way that he's 70. That's crazy to think about

Bubbles

03-10-2010, 06:19 PM

Chuck Norris's tears cure cancer.... Its too bad he doesn't cry.

So much awesome.

S14_Kouki

03-10-2010, 09:35 PM

I would of never thought he was 70.

Gnnr

03-11-2010, 12:11 AM

Wow! Really? He's exceptionally fit. I would have put him at early 50s based on looks. Happy B-Day to Chuck! :bigok:

fliprayzin240sx

03-11-2010, 06:53 AM

Wow! Really? He's exceptionally fit. I would have put him at early 50s based on looks. Happy B-Day to Chuck! :bigok:

Thats what I was thinking...70...really?!?!

murda-c

03-11-2010, 07:06 AM

God i wish my fucking beard would grow in properly.

Maybe if i buy a total gym.

Xbroke_kidX

03-11-2010, 03:39 PM

Chuck Norris got bit by the most poiseness snake in the world. After 5 hours of horrible pain the snake died.

Cant believe hes 70....

tricky_ab

03-11-2010, 03:55 PM

Damn 70?! Already? I just can't believe it...

rb25_s13*CHUKI

03-11-2010, 04:09 PM

Jesus said let there be light, Chuck norris said say please bitch

rb25_s13*CHUKI

03-11-2010, 04:10 PM

Kids wear superman pajamas to bed, superman wears chuck norris pajamas to bed.

Happy bday Chuck norris! P.s Bruce lee will still kick your ass!!!

IntensePower

03-11-2010, 04:23 PM

Kids wear superman pajamas to bed, superman wears chuck norris pajamas to bed.

Happy bday Chuck norris! P.s Bruce lee will still kick your ass!!!

Your last statement is clearly false sir!!! ^^^^^

Chuck Norris can slam a revolving door!

StevenMFQiu

03-11-2010, 05:16 PM

Chuck Norris is the only man in the world that can slam a revolving door. 0.o

murda-c

03-11-2010, 05:24 PM

http://www.icanhasmotivation.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/05/chuck.jpg

DrftSLowHomIe!!

03-11-2010, 06:04 PM

http://g-ecx.images-amazon.com/images/G/01/askville/6666639_35423962_mywrite/boogeymansign.jpg

gotta get a pair of action jeans!!

http://i132.photobucket.com/albums/q11/iminurcultur/chuckpants.jpg

Silverstreek

03-11-2010, 10:46 PM

i forgot Chuck's birthday was today....this explains my bloody stool this morning. well...might as well start writing up my will....

TurboSE

03-11-2010, 11:15 PM

you've all probably heard it, but type "Chuck Norris" into Google and click the "I'm feeling lucky" button...

HBD Chuck!

zspeedrft

03-11-2010, 11:22 PM

he will probably live another 70 years.....happy birthday Mr. Norris

bizarke

03-12-2010, 12:02 AM

chuck norris computer doesn't have the "control key" cuz his always in control.
70 damn total gym must work.lol

bones321

03-12-2010, 12:21 AM

If you spell "Chuck Norris" in scrabble, you win...forever.

Once, Chuck Norris played Russian Roulette with a fully loaded gun, and won

must get me that total gym

Silverstreek

03-12-2010, 01:54 AM

Chuck also once beat a wall in a game of tennis...

eli_eli

03-12-2010, 02:01 AM

They once tried making Chuck Norris toilet paper, but Chuck Norris doesn't take shit from anybody...happy Bday Chuck

TurboSE

03-12-2010, 03:07 AM

Chuck Norris doesn't age, he waits...

Tantwoforty

03-12-2010, 05:39 PM

A blind man once stepped on Chuck Norris' shoe. Chuck replied, "Don't you know who I am? I'm Chuck Norris!" The mere mention of his name cured this man blindness. Sadly the first, last, and only thing this man ever saw, was a fatal roundhouse delivered by Chuck Norris.

soreballz

03-12-2010, 06:48 PM

This isn't Chuck Norris' 70th year of life... This is the 70th year that he's allowed us all to live.

alindeman1989

03-12-2010, 07:05 PM

hes not getting older, the world is getting younger.

rc1honda

03-12-2010, 07:07 PM

Chuck Norris' name in sign language is a middle finger with the hand on fire.

94vert

03-13-2010, 12:05 PM

happy b-day dad

SR_Vlurs

03-13-2010, 02:59 PM

Bruce lee would fuck him up

TurboSE

03-13-2010, 04:22 PM

ThatGuy

03-13-2010, 04:27 PM

why is it that as soon as you mention Chuck Norris, someone has to chime in with a Bruce Lee comment?

It's like saying "A Bald Eagle would fly way faster that a pterodactyl" it's a moot point and we'll never know so why waste your breath?

Actually we would know, because they did fight.

Chuck admitted that Bruce was faster and stronger than he was, but Chuck "out scored" him in the ring.

TurboSE

03-13-2010, 04:47 PM

Actually we would know, because they did fight.

Chuck admitted that Bruce was faster and stronger than he was, but Chuck "out scored" him in the ring.

"Winning" and getting "fucked up" are two different things...they were equal enough in skill that it was a close fight. They had a good fight, Chuck "won." If I fought Chuck, I'd get "fucked up."

It not like it was a huge blow-out.

I've lost fights, and that's exactly what happened...I lost...and I've gotten fucked up in fights...there's a huge difference.

PS - I could've used a better analogy...I used the pterodactyl because it's dead, and we'll never have a chance to settle the dispute.

no slide

03-13-2010, 04:52 PM

now here is a question...

if bruce was still alive would we have bruce lee facts instead of chuck norris facts??

TurboSE

03-13-2010, 04:55 PM

now here is a question...

if bruce was still alive would we have bruce lee facts instead of chuck norris facts??

hmmm...I wasn't alive when he was, how popular was Lee in the States?

no slide

03-13-2010, 04:59 PM

now here is a question...

if bruce was still alive would we have bruce lee facts instead of chuck norris facts??

hmmm...I wasn't alive when he was, how popular was Lee in the States?

i wasnt alive either but my older brother was a huge fan. i would say he is/was pretty popular.

TurboSE

03-13-2010, 05:06 PM

i wasnt alive either but my older brother was a huge fan. i would say he is/was pretty popular.

Crazy example of the Chaos Theory...had Bruce not died, Chuck may not have the endorsements or the notoriety he does today.

chucky norris

03-13-2010, 05:49 PM

chuck norris runs on batteries. specifically, die hards.

StevenMFQiu

03-19-2010, 04:57 AM

Chuck Norris' daughter lost her virginity...but he got it back.

FRpilot

03-19-2010, 11:00 AM

Chuck Norris' daughter lost her virginity...but he got it back.

Wow. LOL :ddog:

thagremlin

03-19-2010, 10:28 PM

Chuck Norris uses Tabasco Sauce for eye drops

happy bday. Mr Norris if that is your real name

If you were to know Chuck Norris' true name, your mind would collapse upon itself.