How Do You Wipe?

[ESmorz]

It has recently occurred to me (and subsequently blown my mind) that a vast majority of people wipe their ass sitting down.

Personally, I find that to restricting. I need to be standing tall over my porcelain artwork, with arms outstretched and the softest paper on the market.

I feel wiping while sitting is something you would do while camping, shitting in a hole, getting revenge, that sort of thing. Just hovering over the bowl and reaching back their like you are committing some kind of crime. I think it says a lot about a person.

So I ask all of you Zilvia, how do you wipe?

http://www.simplegreenaction.ca/eco-tips/blog/wp-content/uploads/2009/11/toilet_paper.jpg

[HyperTek]

ESmorz has reached an all time low for thread topics lol

[ESmorz]

Someone's ashamed to be a sitter.

Oh man.

[jspaeth]

Man I started a thread just like this, and it got closed because some dickwad made a post about wiping with (insert holy book here).

But yeah, I prefer good TP that doesn't crumble, and coming in from the front allows for a better wipe that gets nice even coverage and pressure.

[M11's]

another question to add. fold the TP or waud your tp?

[zylvia213]

shit i use a lot of TP.... for me wipe sitting down.

This is what i use

http://www.papergoodsdirect.com/images/products/scott%20toilet%20paper%20100.jpg

[ZenkiKid]

Charmin ultra that is wet.

[murda-c]

Baby wipes standing up if i'm at home.

A shitload of whatever is at hand if i'm not. still standing up.

[240XTC]

ha ha ha !!!

Would you guys buy one of these?? Toilet paper free......

GQC8Bm1m34I&feature

[charkid]

Sitting down with some :
http://seesdifferent.files.wordpress.com/2009/06/charmin1.jpgat my side.

[blitzsti22]

babywipes ftw

[BustedS13]

sitting, taint to spine

[240sxrb25]

between the legs from the front

[Team DET]

Standing up lol
YouTube - LIL BOOSIE-WIPE ME DOWN (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wNYobSACns4)

[amdnivram]

standing up, staying on the topic of wiping and so on, when i was at a friends house i noticed that i was the only one who didnt throw the paper in the toilet but instead into the trash can. I do this because i hate low flush toilets since they get clogged easily. Does anyone else find not tossing the trash in the toilet weird?

[240XTC]

Standing up lol
YouTube - LIL BOOSIE-WIPE ME DOWN (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wNYobSACns4)


^^^^ lol!!!

[lflkajfj12123]

once in the front

twice from behind

just to make sure

[Mister.E]

standing up, staying on the topic of wiping and so on, when i was at a friends house i noticed that i was the only one who didnt throw the paper in the toilet but instead into the trash can. I do this because i hate low flush toilets since they get clogged easily. Does anyone else find not tossing the trash in the toilet weird?

i know someone who had a problem with an easy clogging toilet and they used to do this. i found it to be pretty damn disgusting to be honest with you.

[Touge Noob S13]

standing up, staying on the topic of wiping and so on, when i was at a friends house i noticed that i was the only one who didnt throw the paper in the toilet but instead into the trash can. I do this because i hate low flush toilets since they get clogged easily. Does anyone else find not tossing the trash in the toilet weird?


I do. As for wiping I stand up, dont know how the sitters manage to find their method comfortable.

[Kamburrito]

It has recently occurred to me (and subsequently blown my mind) that a vast majority of people wipe their ass sitting down.

Personally, I find that to restricting. I need to be standing tall over my porcelain artwork,



i can't even imagine how that can be executed successfully.

[joeapple8]

sitting, how do the hell do u wipe standing?! O.o

[udon!]

omg dude i was just going to make this thread a say ago.

ive ALWAYS stood up to wipe my ass.

how do you do it sitting down? wouldnt your hand be in your shit? while your wrist is touching your sac?

i use baby wipes and throw them in the trash sometimes.

its crazy that my toilet clogs when i just take a shit. no paper lol im just like WTF?

[HyperTek]

yeah tp in the trashcan is pretty disgusting imo, i know we used to have guests and i would always notice how fast the trash can fills up. esp when you got a no-lid trash can, i kind of find it insulting for some reason, please just flush it when your at my house. lol

If im at someones house and I can sense that they got a weak toilet, Ill wait it out and multiflush the contents rather than doing the trashcan thing.

I stand up, not sure how sitting down would work.

[wh0aitznic0]

its crazy that my toilet clogs when i just take a shit. no paper lol im just like WTF?

Haha, when I lived in a complex I had that problem too. Gotta use the plunger and shit.

[240sxrb25]

ive never even heard of stand-up-wiping. i mean, when you stand up, doesnt that squish excess poopy further outward resulting in more to wipe?

ever considered this? http://i33.photobucket.com/albums/d85/jasontucker/b131469715.jpg

[mikefc]

Sitting down,lean on left cheek bringing right airborn,using right hand to wipe,from sack to crack.

[wh0aitznic0]

Oh yeah, I use a tabo when I'm home. And I only shit in places that are clean in my eyes (hotels, friends' houses).

http://www.ica.coop/al-housing/content_images/Philippines%20flag.gif

[Jtuned_andy]

Sitting down, leaning left, back to front. It keeps the shit stains (if you are a hearty shitter) on your gooch rather than on your back or in your crack.

People throw their shitty tp in the trash o_O wtf is that? You're supposed to flush that shit dog, do your bathrooms always smell like shit?

[Mister.E]

Sitting down,lean on left cheek bringing right airborn,using right hand to wipe,from sack to crack.

bingo!

i dont know how you cats stand up. if i did that id assume that the left over shit would just squish between my buttcheeks creating more of a mess than i had before.

[HyperTek]

end result as long as your clean.. Ive had friends who smelled like shit when around em which leave to question their wiping technique lol.

next thing you know it, the lil sissybitch guys here will ask about if anyone goes in public bathrooms.. im surprised theres alot of sissybitch guys out there who wont take a crap at school lol.

[S14Josh]

bingo!

i dont know how you cats stand up. if i did that id assume that the left over shit would just squish between my buttcheeks creating more of a mess than i had before.


My thoughts EXACTLY.


When I was in high school my friend was telling me a story about him getting walked in on standing up wiping his ass at a popeyes chicken and I thought it was the funniest shit I've ever heard in my life. I didn't realize there were so many of you "standing wipers" out there.


I sit, shit, lean, wipe, done.

[HyperTek]

think of it this way, when your in a public bathroom or so and dont really like the seat, you sit real quick and do your thing so you can quickly get off the nasty seat = spending the least amount of time on the seat. lol

When standing, I dont think anyone stands straight up, you usually lean forward a lil and spread your legs a lil, you can get good coverage.. <haha that sounds pretty sick but this whole thread is pretty crappy anyways lol

[wh0aitznic0]

Pun intended.

[S14Josh]

ass gasket it up


That's what they're made for

[325irollin]

regardless of how I do it, there will be shit stuck in my very hairy asshole.. :(

[Shvltme93Notch]

hahaha. my drunk self and drunk roomies laughed soooo hard at this.

[theicecreamdan]

When standing, I dont think anyone stands straight up, you usually lean forward a lil and spread your legs a lil, you can get good coverage.. <haha that sounds pretty sick but this whole thread is pretty crappy anyways lol

That just sounds like a horribly awkward position. Its so much easier to lean while sitting.

[deolio]

definitely hover. nothing worst than a dingle berry getting flicked off onto the floor or something.

does anyone else find it disgusting that most chicks wipe back to front?

[HyperTek]

you guys must be fat if your getting debris in there and worried about contents not being accessible lol


People have did either method all their life, and im sure their parents and parents parents did it, so either technique is handed down. lol

[ESmorz]

When standing, I dont think anyone stands straight up, you usually lean forward a lil and spread your legs a lil, you can get good coverage.. <haha that sounds pretty sick but this whole thread is pretty crappy anyways lol

?http://i2.photobucket.com/albums/y36/AvrilH8er13/wiping.jpg?


Man, I just stand straight up.

I'm white, skinny, and don't have an ass... It works for me. No debris, no nothing.

Who the FUCK would throw shit paper into a trash can?

[nate00]

sitting lean onto left cheek, right in the air, front to back.

[mRclARK1]

?http://i2.photobucket.com/albums/y36/AvrilH8er13/wiping.jpg?


Man, I just stand straight up.

I'm white, skinny, and don't have an ass... It works for me. No debris, no nothing.

Who the FUCK would throw shit paper into a trash can?

A lot of places in the world do this where the plumbing isn't very good. Most of South America does it for one example...

Just use a garbage can with a lid. haha

[BustedS13]

A lot of places in the world do this where the plumbing isn't very good. Most of South America does it for one example...

Just use a garbage can with a lid. haha

how could flimsy paper coated in poop be worse for piping than shit itself? you'd think they'd shit in a trash can and then flush the paper.

[xrockoutx]

totally stand up...and almost anything will flush down my toilet with enough effort.

[cc4usmc]

Stand up when I wipe. But when I sit, I always just sit on my left cheek.

[datboibrad]

i absolutely HATE when people come over, drop a deuce and toss the paper in the trash. thats the worst smelling thing to expierence the next morning since its been festering in the closed bathroom all night.

im a shitter sitter. cant stand up to wipe, it bothers the shit out of me.

also why are we discussing this? next thread will be who all pee's sitting or standing. or procedures for shitting in public!

[BustedS13]

i absolutely HATE when people come over, drop a deuce and toss the paper in the trash.

this FUCKING HAPPENS? IN AMERICA?

[NismoDriverS13]

the people that I live with, do that shit.....some japanese chick and mexican chick.

its gnarly!!! i try to take a shit and the trash is right next to the toilet and i look down and there is tp with kaka on it looking back at me......its fucking gross. and their paper roll is on the side of the wall and hangs down into the kaka tp in the trash can!!!

i use my own paper, wipe standing up.......

[cc4usmc]

This brings back memories of taking a deuce in Iraq. Not cool.

[BustedS13]

the people that I live with, do that shit.....some japanese chick and mexican chick.

its gnarly!!! i try to take a shit and the trash is right next to the toilet and i look down and there is tp with kaka on it looking back at me......its fucking gross. and their paper roll is on the side of the wall and hangs down into the kaka tp in the trash can!!!

i use my own paper, wipe standing up.......

why aren't you like "THIS IS THE UNITED FUCKING STATES, OUR PIPES ARE FINE, STOP BEING AN ASSHOLE"?

[Mister.E]

definitely hover. nothing worst than a dingle berry getting flicked off onto the floor or something.

does anyone else find it disgusting that most chicks wipe back to front?

what the mother fuck? any chick that wipes back to front is just asking for a fucking infection. not only that but its just downright wrong. there should never be any poo in the goo

[NismoDriverS13]

why aren't you like "THIS IS THE UNITED FUCKING STATES, OUR PIPES ARE FINE, STOP BEING AN ASSHOLE"?


u want to know what the worst part of it is??? LOL!!!!

they have two weiner dogs ( idk wtf they are called) but they go to the trash can and take out the kaka paper and tear it apart. I MEAN, FOR CHRIST SAKES!!! ITS IN THE DOGS MOUTH!!! AND THEN THEY LICK THE OWNER ON THE FACE!!!

but everything else is like really clean around the house........

[BustedS13]

u want to know what the worst part of it is??? LOL!!!!

they have two weiner dogs ( idk wtf they are called) but they go to the trash can and take out the kaka paper and tear it apart. I MEAN, FOR CHRIST SAKES!!! ITS IN THE DOGS MOUTH!!! AND THEN THEY LICK THEM ON THE FACE!!!

but everything else is like really clean around the house........

what the fuck third world parallel universe do you live in? i hope it's one where it's okay to hit women, fuck

[325irollin]

the people that I live with, do that shit.....some japanese chick and mexican chick.

its gnarly!!! i try to take a shit and the trash is right next to the toilet and i look down and there is tp with kaka on it looking back at me......its fucking gross. and their paper roll is on the side of the wall and hangs down into the kaka tp in the trash can!!!

i use my own paper, wipe standing up.......

mmmm japanese chick poo poo. I'd have eaten it

seriously though, why would anyone do this? I think it's embarrassing enough when I have to shit at someone's house. I'd be embarrassed as all hell if I threw poo paper away in their trashcan. Especially since a lot of people don't have trash bags in their little bathroom trashcans. poo all over the trashcan mmmm fuck

[NismoDriverS13]

the bad thing is that i cant even tell them anything since they dont even understand english....

and i stay the fuck away from those dogs.....
H.I.V. poodles! lol!

[apex]

the bad thing is that i cant even tell them anything since they dont even understand english....

and i stay the fuck away from those dogs.....
H.I.V. poodles! lol!

how do u live with them but cant talk to them??
how did u move in?

[NismoDriverS13]

how do u live with them but cant talk to them??
how did u move in?


i moved in before they did. the owner is mexican and so the mexican chick is his daughter. the japanese chick brought her friend to translate.

haha, its crazy having a japanese person translate to english to a mexican dude who can barely understand it. i had to go for a drive and a smoke. :ughd:

[ESmorz]

i moved in before they did. the owner is mexican and so the mexican chick is his daughter. the japanese chick brought her friend to translate.

haha, its crazy having a japanese person translate to english to a mexican dude who can barely understand it. i had to go for a drive and a smoke. :ughd:

Sounds like a sitcom waiting to happen.

Drive to Starbucks and write it.

[NismoDriverS13]

lol

sorry i hate starbucks and all coffee in general.

id write it, but i ran out of tp..............

[lflkajfj12123]

yeah i think its pretty disgusting if you throw your shit paper in the garbage

fucking gross

SHIT DOES STINK YOU KNOW

[Quail]

The thought of throwing shitty paper in the bin blows my mind. Urgh.

[BustedS13]

ha. he said bin. <3

[dudermagee]

u want to know what the worst part of it is??? LOL!!!!

they have two weiner dogs ( idk wtf they are called) but they go to the trash can and take out the kaka paper and tear it apart. I MEAN, FOR CHRIST SAKES!!! ITS IN THE DOGS MOUTH!!! AND THEN THEY LICK THE OWNER ON THE FACE!!!

but everything else is like really clean around the house........

I gagged a little when I read this:barf:
WTF thats sick, why would you throw poo covered paper in a trash

I ALWAYS wipe down the seat in a public bathroom (read that this lowers the chances of getting crabs), I never use a public one if its got any poo or pee on it, I sit down to wipe, lean on one cheek, and wipe front to back

I think it comes down to a cultural thing in the end

[Future240]

i moved in before they did. The owner is mexican and so the mexican chick is his daughter. The japanese chick brought her friend to translate.

Haha, its crazy having a japanese person translate to english to a mexican dude who can barely understand it. I had to go for a drive and a smoke. :ughd:

move. Out. Now.


Stop reading this post and gtfo.





Go do it now!!!!

[Quail]

ha. he said bin. <3

Haha, I hadn't realised Americans don't say bin. I purposely didn't say rubbish!

[greddy2die]

it blows my mind how many people on here know people that throw their shitty tp in the trash can. wtf is up with that shit..thats just not cool

I sit down to wipe and like many others on here, i lean, lift a leg partially and go to town.

[fckillerbee]

LMAO at thread. I sit down and whipe. lean....blah blah. I thought mexicans throw away tp in the trash cause they don't have a great sewer system. so its just habit or not knowing we have a better flow.

[Daniel.]

mmmm japanese chick poo poo. I'd have eaten it


Word.

http://mutesaint.files.wordpress.com/2009/03/2717.jpg?w=400&h=320

[s13 @ fullboost]

http://i36.photobucket.com/albums/e49/hasanlovesfood/toilet_paper1-thumb.jpg

ugh well I use super sweet JDM toilet paper it's dyno proven I wipe my ass so fast. I also use a little water on first two wipes that gets majority then I go to dry make sure I get all of it. Yes I stand up and I use the toilet to throw them away =]

[FaLKoN240]

definitely hover. nothing worst than a dingle berry getting flicked off onto the floor or something.

does anyone else find it disgusting that most chicks wipe back to front?

what the mother fuck? any chick that wipes back to front is just asking for a fucking infection. not only that but its just downright wrong. there should never be any poo in the goo

Girls don't wipe back to front, that's how you get SHIT in your vagina, any girl that does that needs to slap her mom for poor parenting.

I'm a leaner, and I wipe twice, I use like 6 squares and fold them up.

My ex-gf would just wad shit up and we'd go through a roll of TP in like 3 days.

[Touge Noob S13]

I think im going to be the first to defend the trash can method here. My house has those terrible low flow toliets that clog real easily, that is why we use a trash can. You never throw the used tp shit side up in the trash can, that is courtesy for the next person that uses the bathroom. No, the trash does not smell, do you tp flushers think that small smears of poop on paper are going to smell really bad? We also put a plastic groccery bag over the trash can, at the end of the day the bag is removed and disposed of.

[greddy2die]

what happens if you has a hairy booty hole and you get some unknown cling-ons and then you wipe and you have real mess of TP? You still throw that shitty paper in the can?

MEH!!! ugh, just the thought of throwing shitty TP in the trashcan is gross

[lflkajfj12123]

you're sick bro

[royer]

3 squares folded in half, upward motion.

[jspaeth]

I hear so many people saying "I wipe twice" or "I wipe 3 times"...

Wtf???

Am I the only one who wipes like 10+ times?

I make sure that there is NOTHING there, period.

Prefer to be next to a sink so I can use dampened TP towards the end of the process.

I can't imagine just doing an "okay" job.

Gross.

[Touge Noob S13]

what happens if you has a hairy booty hole and you get some unknown cling-ons and then you wipe and you have real mess of TP?


Good thing I dont have that problem.

[fckillerbee]

wipe till the job is done....but if you are wiping 10+ times....you either shat all over yourself, or you aren't productively wiping your ass. I think my worst days would be like 6 at most.

speaking of dingleberries...haha.... I knew a heavy set guy that had his wife take out of clump of shit from his ass cause of all the ass hair he had...he basically couldn't fully wipe his own ass he was that big. makes me worry about the people larger than him. or bodybuilders?

[irax]

Oh yeah, I use a tabo when I'm home. And I only shit in places that are clean in my eyes (hotels, friends' houses).

http://www.ica.coop/al-housing/content_images/Philippines%20flag.gif



ugh... what does philippines or being pinoy/pinay have to do with that? they do that shit in other countries. besides tabo is just a manual bidet

I wipe 3 times or until i'm clean. If i'm clean by the second wipe, i do one more for good measure. Otherwise I keep wiping until i'm clean.


also if you know a chick that wipes back to front, that shit is disgusting and unsanitary. she can get infections. never go down on a chick if she goes back to front.

[hOngsterr]

i sit down, reach back and wipe. lol

i cant imagine standing up and wiping lol.
i tried once from a topic like this, and was like i gotta sit down.

and for other post there were in here, i hate the toilets that you have to hold down
the handle,
if not then all of your pee or number 2 doesn't flush all of it.

[Ceepo]

I hear so many people saying "I wipe twice" or "I wipe 3 times"...

Wtf???

Am I the only one who wipes like 10+ times?

I make sure that there is NOTHING there, period.

Prefer to be next to a sink so I can use dampened TP towards the end of the process.

I can't imagine just doing an "okay" job.

Gross.

I have to agree, i wipe my ass about 30 times makin sure there isnt any shit on there, its nasty if you got a shitty arse!!! As for the toilet paper o the trash thats kinda nasty, i do understand the low flow toilet problem(i have that problem as well) but i will double/triple/quad flush that shit(literly) before i would throw shitty paper in my trash, expecially if thats the bathroom people that visit my house use... if it gets clogged thats what a plunger is for...

http://i.somethingawful.com/u/docevil/youranonymouscoworker/plunger_final.gif

[SkyHighPsi]

I don't wipe at all

[JVD]

Question for those who stand...

If you have like a super messy shit... and you stand up... do you try to keep your cheeks spread? I mean, you'd just be squishing it by standing up.

That is my logic for sitting down.

My method:
-sitting down
-right cheek up off the seat
-taint to spine

Oh, and throwing them in the trash? Are you fucking serious? I like my bathroom to be a nice comfortable place for future shits. I don't want it smelling like a fucking public bathroom.

[fckillerbee]

speaking of sanitation...anyone use a clean tp to flush with on the handle... I'm kinda a clean freak with my hands.

I'll use tp to flush...after I'm done washing my hands, water still running, i'll dry my hands, use the towl to turn the water off, and open the door of the restroom.

[greddy2die]

speaking of sanitation...anyone use a clean tp to flush with on the handle... I'm kinda a clean freak with my hands.

I'll use tp to flush...after I'm done washing my hands, water still running, i'll dry my hands, use the towl to turn the water off, and open the door of the restroom.

if im in a public restroom i just shit in the trash can directly, no need to touch the handle at all.

LOL jk jk

if its a public restroom i try to use my hands as little as possible touching stuff. I will use paper towels or a piece of TP to flush, turn the sink on/off and open the door. Public restrooms in some places are like wtf/?!

HOWEVER thats only if i REALLY have to dump, i will hold it in as long as possible. However, i do have IBS :duh:so if i gotta really dook, i gotta fuckin dook soon..lol

[NismoDriverS13]

haha, so today i wake up in the morning and go to take a shower and there is a tp with kaka facing up and it smells, they never spray any scents afterwards. i get fucking shivers me timbers when i see that shit!!!

im clean, if i shit....i got to wipe multiple times so that i see that there is no kaka skid marks left hahaha. i usually like to take a shower after i shit. then i clean everything after myself, toilet seat, floor if i happened to be drunk and miss the hole, spray scents and leave no trace of what went on in the bathroom. i think i can get away with murder. lol.

[Team DET]

Hell Yea 3 Shells LOL
http://i50.tinypic.com/14wfw2r.jpg

[NismoDriverS13]

if im in a public restroom i just shit in the trash can directly, no need to touch the handle at all.

LOL jk jk

if its a public restroom i try to use my hands as little as possible touching stuff. I will use paper towels or a piece of TP to flush, turn the sink on/off and open the door. Public restrooms in some places are like wtf/?!

HOWEVER thats only if i REALLY have to dump, i will hold it in as long as possible. However, i do have IBS :duh:so if i gotta really dook, i gotta fuckin dook soon..lol



agree with u on that mang!

some public restrooms are hella dirty! i was doing canyon runs and stopped at a large outlet store to take a shit.....i oppened a door to a stall and there was shit everywhere!!!! the floor, the walls, the fucking CEILING!!!! i mean come on, someone put shitty hand marks on the walls. I ran away and didnt even need to take a shit anymore. :dead:

i take shit in the nature now, i bring tp with me when i go for canyon runs LOL!!!

[greddy2die]

ROFL!! oh man, ok good i thought i was the only one to bringing TP with me on road trips..haha

I live in S. FL and I would drive like 4hrs north to a friends house on weekends and part of I75 I have to take runs completely east/west through the everglades and there is only 1 exit to go to the indian reservations.

So, if you have to shit on the stretch of the highway your pretty much SOL. That is my reasoning for carrying TP with me on those road trips lol

[Dirty Habit]

Why is everybody always picking on me?



Cause you run like a girl and you sit down to pee.

[Ceepo]

Truck stops are the worst, if you gotta Dook and there are 2 truckers on either side of you Dookin there brains out ruinin your Poogasim!!!! If i can give anyone advice, dont ever go to a truck stop!!! EVER!!!!

[murda-c]

I'm telling you guys, use the pre-moistened baby wipes.

So fresh.

[TravisSW]

There aint nothing wrong with me!

[NismoDriverS13]

There aint nothing wrong with me!

so i heard! haha.

[dert420sx]

wiping just smears it. lol

filipino style: add a lil soap and water and it's like you just stepped out of the shower!
http://pilipinoanglahiko.files.wordpress.com/2009/06/tabo.jpg

[fckillerbee]

Hell Yea 3 Shells LOL
http://i50.tinypic.com/14wfw2r.jpg

So I saw that movie when it first came out...and they never told on how it worked...i forever have still be curious!!!!

[thatdrifterguy]

i lean and wipe. my toilet is low pressure too so what i do is get an extra bucket of water and flush it down with the regular flush. works just like a high pressure flusher.

[lflkajfj12123]

this thread is mega gross

[demonspeed]

this thread is mega gross

+1 But for the sake of it...standup with wipees...anything else is uncivilized lol

[Matej]

http://www.kissandmakeup.tv/prada%20towel.jpg


this FUCKING HAPPENS? IN AMERICA?
Haha, when I lived in the dorms, a guy I was friends with had a roommate from Iran who kept doing that.

[fckillerbee]

+1 But for the sake of it...standup with wipees...anything else is uncivilized lol

haha so I got a visual of a grown man with pants down to ankles standing trying to wipe ass....just seems unusual to stand. a coworker and I had a conversation about it...it seems like if we were cavemen, we would squat to shit...and then wipe squating..

[demonspeed]

haha so I got a visual of a grown man with pants down to ankles standing trying to wipe ass....just seems unusual to stand. a coworker and I had a conversation about it...it seems like if we were cavemen, we would squat to shit...and then wipe squating..

lol i actually tried wiping my ass sitting down today and it just wasnt working for me. maybe i need more practice lmao:ddog:

[ZX88]

diagonally

[Flipzide]

This thread is awesome.

I wipe standing up. I also throw used tp in the trash, but only at home or at other homes where i'm told to specifically throw the tp in the trash because of the plumbing. Otherwise, the tp goes in the toilet to be flushed.

Baby wipes are the jam if there are any in the bathroom :).

[Matej]

diagonally
In Tubgirl position.

[murda-c]

I dab only.

I am of a higher class and i have clean shits.

[fckillerbee]

lol i actually tried wiping my ass sitting down today and it just wasnt working for me. maybe i need more practice lmao:ddog:

sit on the seat...lean to the left...front to back wiping...remember people...sanitation..lol...

here's a new one for people to try that will make you feel strangely awkward...don't look at your poop when you flush. For some reason..I can't remember a time when I didn't look at the poop i was flushing. lol

[Bubbles]

I took a massive shit in the port-a-potty at D1.


There was 2-3 of the models standing right there, 3-4 hot girls, and 1 guy.

When I got out, there wasn't a single person standing there, ha ha.

[SexPanda]

what the fuck kind of thread is this? Seriously? Seriously...

I wipe with TP lol

[SuicidnS13]

WOW, WTF just had to subscribe for the giggles to see it in my subscriptions list!

[ZX88]

wipe till it bleeds.....

[VAs13]

I hear so many people saying "I wipe twice" or "I wipe 3 times"...

Wtf???

Am I the only one who wipes like 10+ times?

I make sure that there is NOTHING there, period.

Prefer to be next to a sink so I can use dampened TP towards the end of the process.

I can't imagine just doing an "okay" job.

Gross.

i am the same damn way 10+ times

[dat411kid]

this thread is mega gross
lol.. so true..

[Matej]

Front to face.

[mr.lonelys12]

ha ha ha !!!

Would you guys buy one of these?? Toilet paper free......

GQC8Bm1m34I&feature

these systems are very nice and i can say so from experience. a warm jet of water and air drying system, its quicker than you would think and not as awkward as you would believe.

the real question is back to front or front to back wiping motion? or are some of you guys the crazy so called sidewinders

[Slammed180]

Ok, picture this.


So, I finish dropping the kids off at the pool. Then I stand up, bend over, and reach for my toes, making sure to not bend at the knees. Then it's more of a wax-on-wax-off motion to make sure I get 360* of wiping coverage. Then I proceed to leave the washroom without flushing or washing my hands.

The feeling of satisfaction is overwhelming, and I begin to cry with joy.

[chrisa]

To add to Mrlonley's post, i agree with this system it is actually nice. BUT when i was in japan a lot of the toilets are like this, even public ones. If you notice the lil arm that comes out to clean your asshole, when it cleans poop falls on the arm. Then when the next person goes to use it the arm sprays the water along with other peoples poop particles.

[irax]

Ok, picture this.


So, I finish dropping the kids off at the pool. Then I stand up, bend over, and reach for my toes, making sure to not bend at the knees. Then it's more of a wax-on-wax-off motion to make sure I get 360* of wiping coverage. Then I proceed to leave the washroom without flushing or washing my hands.

The feeling of satisfaction is overwhelming, and I begin to cry with joy.


that just sounds like your playing with your brown eye, not so much that your cleaning your self.

[lflkajfj12123]

I took a massive shit in the port-a-potty at D1.


There was 2-3 of the models standing right there, 3-4 hot girls, and 1 guy.

When I got out, there wasn't a single person standing there, ha ha.

you were there?

how come we didn't HANG

[Slammed180]

that just sounds like your playing with your brown eye, not so much that your cleaning your self.

Is that really such a bad thing? :bigok:

[erik05v]

i dnt knw how you people wipe sitting down i gotta be standing up knees bent and my back arched then wipe front to back then back to front till clean lol :wiggle:

[Bubbles]

you were there?

how come we didn't HANG


Girls, making me crazy.

Glad to get back to the sticks and think straight again.

[ESmorz]

Question for those who stand...

If you have like a super messy shit... and you stand up... do you try to keep your cheeks spread? I mean, you'd just be squishing it by standing up.

That is my logic for sitting down.

All you have to do is hold one cheek.

It's not rocket science.

:keke:

[SlideWell]

i lift my ass up, pour water on my ass hole with a watering spout, shake, then wipe, repeat if necessary. i use the harshest toilet paper available to man.

[DataXUnknown]

I shit right before I go into the shower, saving TP I use the shower nozzle to blast my ass clean. Then proceed to my wonderful shower once any residue has washed down the drain.

[AS240]

^^^wtf hahahahha!!

man there are some creative people out there lol

[cleantune]

http://i627.photobucket.com/albums/tt352/cleantune2/beavis10.jpg

[spoolandslide]

I use a vacuum to clean my poop mishaps and blunders.

[I LUV MY S13]

stand up...gotta do it sitting down in jail though or you'll get tha beat down

[DataXUnknown]

stand up...gotta do it sitting down in jail though or you'll get tha beat down

Someones got some wonderful experiences....


lol

[wangan_cruiser]

fuck that shit. I ONLY ONLY ONLY USE TABO AT HOME. fuck that


i dont like the feeling of using tp wipe.

if im not home i have no choice but use tp of course but i have to wet it and do it at least 6 times till i can feel it is really clean and good to go.

[wangan_cruiser]

stand up...gotta do it sitting down in jail though or you'll get tha beat down

hahaha wipe it stand up or you get your ass raped there LOL

[mRclARK1]

how could flimsy paper coated in poop be worse for piping than shit itself? you'd think they'd shit in a trash can and then flush the paper.

No idea really... But 9 times out of 10 when a toilet is clogged... It's the paper.

All I know too is that I've spent a lot of time in countries that throw it in the trash instead of flushing. Four or five times I've forgot and flushed it... Twice it resulted in me getting a plunger.

I don't question it anymore. When I'm in third world nations. Garbage can it is.

Here? Flush it obviously. haha

[napaKAliboog]

I shit before i shower also... if im at a public bathroom i use as much recycled paper as i can ahahahah

[irax]

wet paper tends to stick to things, poop just slides and smears.

[DreamN]

wow.... seriously guys. wow...

[irax]

this thread should be called the science of shit.

[nwmrkt]

start sittin with 1 or 2 wipes then the captain morgan foot on the stool/wipe to finish.

[Bubbles]

Pulling boardslides on the inside of a freshly cleaned toilet with my turds is one of the few pleasures I have in life.

[Deftec]

Somebody on another forum compared this to detailing cars.

Use the wet wipes for the first part of it to get rid of the major cleanup

Then go back with the dry(toilet paper) for the final touch up

[lflkajfj12123]

also

i take a dump 80% of the time right before i shower

makes things much nicer :)

[Enna]

I find it funny that neither side understands how the other does it.

[Shaminii]

I wipe my ass stand slightly, not in completely stand straight but to the point where my body is making an angle. I guess some would call it a lean forward but I'm stand up from the toilet. I wipe till I don't see anymore poo stains. Then I wipe between my balls sacks and thighs. Throw toilet paper in toilet. Ever since my roommate told me that shit sprays when you flush, I've developed a habit of closing the toilet lid down and then flushing.

[murda-c]

I have never had toilet paper clog the toilet, but my shits clog toilets all the time.

sometimes just one big ol log curls around and sits perfectly over the hole.