At work, alone. #2

[Bigsyke]

I know there is some doctors on here. What style breathing should I be doing while trying to postpone amargeddon in the toilet boil, while at work alone and can not leave - no questions.

Had to cover a store to let my employees hit up a ball game, and the steak chipolte burreto is causing a menstral type cramp in my belly. Ive used about 7 paper towel sheets to wipe my forehead down to prevent sweat from dripping on my shirt.....people know, its not hard to figure out due to the fruity stance im posted up in.

Milk, bananas, holding my breath? what can I do!!!?

So many beautiful ladies, dont wanna crap my pants and have to book it to the nearest fire excape while leaving a trail of evidence to know I was the one who dropped a paveway 500lb bunker buster in my pants.

[90hatchie]

close shop
take dump
open

[Homer_Simpson]

LOL, you're avoiding the inevitable man. I've been there and nothing worked, the sweaty palms, churning bowels etc. Once that final monstrous wave rolls in, you will either have to hit the crapper or shit your pants.

[pungkiteater_671]

squeeze ur butt cheeks together and pull down on ur chair lmao but if u have to go u have to go lol

[FaLKoN240]

I always close up for 10 minutes, better than shitting yourself.

I'm working alone today and took a dump like 15 minutes ago LOL.

[Bigsyke]

I had a line of customers waiting, its nearly impossible to excuse yourself for 20+ minutes, plus if my corp complicance team found out id be violating a code of conduct.

[silviaguy240]

not really. you're health is more important than the business. oh yea, you let your coworkers skip out. your fault i guess.

[aoiken3]

i think we've all been there. im no doctor but my advice is to just suck it in and lock you ass cheeks as tight as you can to prevent a premature eruption. good luck and godspeed

[240love]

my friend say that when he needs to take a shit really bad and theres no where he converts his shit to farts hahaha

[Bubbles]

How can you take time to post on the interwebz but not drop a deuce?

[Daniel.]

not really. you're health is more important than the business. oh yea, you let your coworkers skip out. your fault i guess.

+1111111111111111

Your health as an employee is way more important. Seriously.

BUT, you let your employees go to the ball game. So you pretty much fucked yourself hardcore on that one.

[Shadowhunter]

Dude just go take a fat shit, if you got time to post on here you got time to drop a duece.

[Enna]

Hahahahahahahahahahahaha. I'm sorry man but this is great to me lol. Seriously close shop and do the deed. I'm not supposed to leave my job period when I'm by myself, but when you gotta shit, you gotta shit. They will understand. Just don't do it too often.

[ronmcdon]

Shit happens.
Just go take a 10 min break.
Things could be much worse for the customers

[Homer_Simpson]

I had a line of customers waiting, its nearly impossible to excuse yourself for 20+ minutes, plus if my corp complicance team found out id be violating a code of conduct.
I don't know if they would rather you go the restroom and handle your shit, or drop a massive log in front of a full house of customers.

[Sil-Abc]

just crap your pants just so we can have a fun chuckle at ur expense :D

[ILoveMyRHS13]

Funniest thread in a while.

Close that bitch up and let er rip!

[jamg]

just take a 30 second poop.

you're about to explode, and it's going to SUCKKKKKKK trying to pull those pants down.

becuaase that's when you REALLY want to poop. and when you get them down, force everything out. shouldn't take less than 30 seconds.

[Homer_Simpson]

just take a 30 second poop.

you're about to explode, and it's going to SUCKKKKKKK trying to pull those pants down.

becuaase that's when you REALLY want to poop. and when you get them down, force everything out. shouldn't take less than 30 seconds.

Ahahah, you're talking about "the move".

[Matej]

What type of store is this?

Run to the diaper isle.

[FaLKoN240]

I'm pretty sure not having anyone there, and you not being able to take a shit when you need to is AGAINST THE LAW.