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View Full Version : Never Steal Doughnuts

karl wasabi
10-09-2007, 06:18 PM
This is a funny story one of my friends sent me. I didn't think that stealing a doughnut could be such a harsh crime. lol.

http://www.stltoday.com/stltoday/news/stories.nsf/missouristatenews/story/2F37838AFD546C9A8625736D000B589F?OpenDocument
azndoc
10-09-2007, 06:21 PM
Hmmmmmm....... Donut.........
rainier
10-09-2007, 06:22 PM
ive done it. it was like 10pm and i guess the guy who was supposed to work the shift left leaving the WHOLE doughnut shop open to anyone who wanted one.

we were all sober, just wanting a doughnut. and he wasnt there. waiting like 10 minutes in that store ringing that damn bell, then one of us grabbed a doughnut, and the rest followed. we werent stupid enough to steal anything else though.

went there the next day and it was some NEW guy who got hired on the spot that morning. lol
ManoNegra
10-09-2007, 06:23 PM
Harsh.
They should punish them like parents do when they catch their underage kid smoking: make the culprit eat a few boxes straight.
2ilvia
10-09-2007, 06:44 PM
whoa he could get 30 years, ha idiot
kontodude
10-09-2007, 07:05 PM
damn this makes me want a doughnut...
DRavenS13
10-09-2007, 07:12 PM
I think I want a donut now too. Who follows a person stealing 1 donut??
Akiros
10-09-2007, 07:13 PM
damn this makes me want a doughnut...

+1
fckmsglength
illvialuver
10-09-2007, 09:27 PM
man my friend owns a donut shop and nobody still s donuts, Once a guy asked for half a dozen and i put it on the counter he asked for a drink i turned to get the drink and he bolted, I guess he was hungry.
But donut shops are crazier than the quickie mark that jay and silent bob frequent. the craziest shit happens there.

for example last night, its like 1145 pm, and im standing outside with my brother and three of our friends when this little mexican guy wearing a over sized sweater shoes and shorts, walks up says whats up than reaches for my brothers balls, my brother backed a way and said "wtf"
he said I am sorry you guys are not gay? we all say " no are you?" and he says "no but just checking"

his eyes are frantically moving around in his head , he is really fidgety and i think he is on meth, than he asks for a cig and a light and upon receiving it, runs into the middle of the street waving his arms trying to stop cars.
he run back after my friend is yellin to watch out for cars and to get out of the street.
and he says " I gotta catch that light, let me know when its green"
so I say "its green!"(it was clearly red)
but he jumps up and sprints across the middle of the intersection an falls flat on his face and his shoe flys of, he almost gets ran over, he than gets up and starts to hit cars as they drive by, and making gesture to smoke or to suck dick to the other cars that are just out of his reach, a guy yells for him to get out of the street, im laughin my ass off, and my friend calls the cops, I figure to let him get hit or something (natural selection right?, and there wasn't allot of traffic, just the usual 12 am traffic)

the cops come, and they pull out the tazers ( when they pulled up he was trying to stop them and ask them for smokings or something else) they ask him what the deal was and he said he was skateboarding to his grandmas house(he didn't have a skateboard)
he was acting weird so they took him away for his own safety.

I really wanted to see him get tazered.

but crazy shit happens at the donut shop on the regular.
Tops*
10-09-2007, 09:52 PM
"And Masters never got a chance to enjoy that fateful doughnut.

He said he threw it to the ground when he fled."

LOL!

Man, he is going to get raped hard in prison.
Bubba - Whatchu in here fo' playa?
Masters - I stole a doughnut...
Bubba - (BAM!)
cdlong
10-10-2007, 12:30 AM
i love how he offered to give it back. yeah, i really want your pocket lint donut.

i used to work retail, shoplifters piss me off too. i think that guy deserves what he's got coming. if he had just offered to pay for it, it would have been fine.
DRavenS13
10-10-2007, 12:38 AM
But, it's a friggin donut. I know it's the principle of the thing, but still. Who trips off of a donut? It might have been thrown away at the end of the day anyway.
cdlong
10-10-2007, 01:32 AM
exactly, so why hit the lady? just say sorry, throw some change at her, then run.
illvialuver
10-10-2007, 01:52 AM
and how the hell did an old lady get close enough to grab his arm? this is just natural selection, if he ends up in prison at least his stupid ass can't make any kids.
Farzam
10-10-2007, 06:06 PM
We were talking about this in Law and Justice.