The Most Embarrasing Response Thread

[ALTRNTV]

I thought this would make a good thread, to get some laughs and to see how much we own ourselves sometimes.

Keep this PG-13, you know what I mean.

Here's some of mine:

Girl at theater: Enjoy your movie
Me: You too :hammer:
(isn't that a typical response anyways?)

I was at work one day when one of my "plump" co-workers asked me for a ride home. I remembered that I took out my front seat because I was going to pick up a Chuki bumper after work that day (mind you, I also have no back seats). I told her that she wouldn't fit back there, and she gave me the meanest look ever. I didn't mean to be mean like that, but I honestly know she would not fit in the back of my coupe. I can't look at her with a straight face anymore. :Owned:

[SimpleS14]

hmmm....can't of any really...expect...


One day I was walking out of a Starbucks and as I'm heading towards the door I see the CUTEST girl trailing behind me. I open the door for her and she walks out and kindly says thank you. I smile and say "Thank you and come again"....I froze for a bit and couldn't look at her after saying that.

Then there was this time I was walking out of Home Depot with a customer's cart full of stuff. I see some lot attendents and yell "I NEED YAS HELPS!!!" I was dead serious in my tone...mind you I don't talk like that at all...I instantly covered my mouth like "wtf did I just say?". Luckily nobody heard me since it was in a parking garage and a truck was driving by.

[downshift_sideways]

My girlfriend and I were moving shit into my storage.

girlfriend: Baby, I think I started my period.

ant(me): Oh damn, do you need anything?

girlfriend: No, but this box is a little bit heavy for me.

ant(me): Damn I know, Your carring too much weight with you.

girlfriend: Yells out "What the Fuck, are you saying i'm fat??".

Then I do the typical apologiez, and make her feel beautiful and slim.

[ThatGuy]

When my wife and I were dating, she stayed home from work one day, sick. I came over after work and hung out with her to make her feel better. I went up to the kitchen to get a drink and her mom stopped me, "Is she feeling any better?". Totally without thinking I switched into smartass mode and blurted out, "She feels fine to me!". Her mom's jaw hit the floor, and I walked away laughing to myself, "Did I really just say that?". :keke:

[240's"r"us]

hahahahha this freckin thread cracks me up
and simples14 you should be the greeter at wally word hahaha

[180sExy]

my moment was when i was kissing my ex, we were goin at it an the all of a sudden i had too sneez!!!!!!i started too pull back but she had her hand on the back of my head an kinda held my head,soo yeah i sneezed her mouth =/

[TipStylez]

I was at work one day when one of my "plump" co-workers asked me for a ride home. I remembered that I took out my front seat because I was going to pick up a Chuki bumper after work that day (mind you, I also have no back seats). I told her that she wouldn't fit back there, and she gave me the meanest look ever. I didn't mean to be mean like that, but I honestly know she would not fit in the back of my coupe. I can't look at her with a straight face anymore. :Owned:

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH:Owned:

[Helghast]

^^

That's not a response, that's disgusting.

EDIT: Fucking Tipstylez...

[TipStylez]

^? Huh...im lost.

[downshift_sideways]

lmao. /\

This thread is funny

[Akiros]

my moment was when i was kissing my ex, we were goin at it an the all of a sudden i had too sneez!!!!!!i started too pull back but she had her hand on the back of my head an kinda held my head,soo yeah i sneezed her mouth =/
haha, i pictured that and LOL'd hard... haha.. play on playa:werd:

[ALTRNTV]

my moment was when i was kissing my ex, we were goin at it an the all of a sudden i had too sneez!!!!!!i started too pull back but she had her hand on the back of my head an kinda held my head,soo yeah i sneezed her mouth =/

You share germs when kissing, so I don't see anything wrong with that. :fart:

lol

[gotta240]

haha. I've done the "you too" thing many times.

Like "enjoy your flight", "enjoy your trip," "enjoy your food"...Yup. done all those.

[SochBAT]

Haha, so i was going to rolling rice in ChinoHills to get food, and i kinda just got outta the shower, smelling all nice and fresh. This is when i had my longer hair, emo combover. I go there pretty often, but im always still amazed just seein her.

Britney = Oh, you smell nice today. Got a date?
Me = At this hour? You're crazy.
Britney = haha, you look differnt. what'd you do to your hair?
Me = (WTF face) huh? Its stock...
Britney = (Super WTF face)

then, as i'm walkin out to my car, i realized what i said.

Gayest Moment in the world.

And now she doesn't work there. /sad

[ALTRNTV]

It's stock... HAHAHAHA

[LB.Motoring]

^ LOL i use that so much,

i think ive used OEM too, bahahahah

:keke:

[<3MyRiceRocKet]

Haha I give you that one akademik..haha One time I went to starbucks with my friends and we had been cruisin for awhile already. So when it was his turn to order, the lady asked and he replied: "I'd like a tall Honda." WTF? stil puzzles me to today.

[airsoft]

I did this... still do...

call friends at their home:

"Where you at?"

Friend:

"I'm at home..."

[ALTRNTV]

^
I do the same thing. I have this done to me:

(I'm asleep)
*cell rings*
Me: Hello.. (in a "I just woke up" voice)
Friend: Did I wake you up?
Me: .......

:hammer:

[HyperTek]

fucking simoun.. lol good thread

Sometimes, I use "I know im just testing you" as a cover up when i make a mistake wiht someone or something.. "and you passed!" Like if i forgot something at work, and I ask my coworker about it, and to ease the embarresment of me asking, i will turn the situation into a funny situation. haha i dunno im a dork

[usdm180sx]

I was having lunch with my friend and this gurl he's trying to get with. We start talking about going out to eat after clubbing.

So she says: "I'll pretty much put anything in my mouth after I go clubbing."

After realizing what she said and putting her foot in her mouth we pretty much tried to act like we didn't hear what she said haha.

[HyperTek]

lmao

that reminds me, at my work i answer phones for teh newspaper, after i greeted this old lady, she says "Hi Ivonna Cox here and i want a paper" I go "excuse me?"

[airsoft]

lol, i do this...

I go to friends houses, and clearly they are eating, or reading or doing something of the obvious and...

"Aye what you doing right now"

haha

[HKsilvia]

On a hot day, went into starbuck trying to get a drink.
cashier: what can i get for you today?
me: can i get a mango-a-gogo
cashier: (wtf face)
me: ...OOH..oaps...sry..

[ALTRNTV]

^
Jamba Juice, hahaha.

[SimpleS14]

my moment was when i was kissing my ex, we were goin at it an the all of a sudden i had too sneez!!!!!!i started too pull back but she had her hand on the back of my head an kinda held my head,soo yeah i sneezed her mouth =/


lol...that is just nasty (yet hilarious)...no wonder she's your ex lol

[exitspeed]

This one is really bad:

I worked with a girla few years back at a furniture store. Her fiance commited suicide via shotgun to the mouth. Pretty f'd up stuff was going on with all that.

Well I had a phrase I used commonly when something would go wrong, "I'm gonna blow my head off".

Well after this girl took some time off and finally came back to work. The FIRST day a bunch of us are all sitting there and something happened and I'm like "Ah, I'm gonna blow my head off". Her jaw dropped and she burst into tears and ran into another office.

Obviously saying it was an accident...

[SimpleS14]

^--- whoa....

[WilloW]

My wife loves that damn "Scoop-O-Mango" at Q-Cup and I'm always the one ordering, and I've always refered to it as a "Scoop-O-Crap". One day we went and I ordered as usual, and sure enough I tried to or a "Scoop-O-Crap". The girl taking my order literally drop her jaw, and my wife turned all red. Lets just say she had a real good laugh at me after that.

I've also went to McDonald's trying to order a Whopper and vice versa.

[highwaystar22]

I had been having some sinus issues because I was sick and I had a very important job interview with a large bank. I went into the bathroom and adjusted myself to make sure eveything was in the right place, and I kept having to blow my nose repeatedly. I scowered and scraped my nose as best I could and checked before I left and everything was cool. In route to the office I was being interviewed in I sneezed. I went through an entire 45 minute interview with a cliff hanger in plain view. When I was walking out a teller looked at me and kinda chuckled and I wondered why. I didn't see it until I got into my car and looked in the rear view mirror. Needless to say I still got the job, but couldn't believe no one told me about it...:duh:

[exitspeed]

:o

Girl at theater: Enjoy your movie
Me: You too :hammer:
(isn't that a typical response anyways?)



It should be if you have manners. I'm suprised at how many people I talk to on the phone and I ask them how their day is and they just reply with an answer. I couldn't imagine just answering that question and not asking how their day is going too.

I do the "you too" response all the time. I'm always like :duh:

[ManoNegra]

Phone rings at apartment...
Me: Hello, computer department, this is Juan speaking. How can I help you....?

crap.

This was when I worked retail years ago. Happened often.

[LB.Motoring]

^LOL Yah i use to work @ a pizza place, pick up the phone with the quickness, thank you for calling marcell.....MOM? oh hi, yah im at home... ok, ill pick him up..... :duh:

[SiI40sx]

this one time when I was single, I was in a sociology class and there was this one cute girl I wanted to talk to to get her number and after class my opening line was going to be like, "hey whats up, this class is pretty hard huh? maybe we can study together or something" it was something of that nature but point is i was just trying to get her number

so we get out and shes walking and her friend catches up to her and I say my line, and she interrupts me and says

her: "actually no not really its not"
her friend: "yea i dont think its hard either"
me: (stuck trying to say something)
her: "yea its pretty easy"

then they get in the elevator and leave

lol WORST game I have EVER spat...

[Tenchuu]

this one time when I was single, I was in a sociology class and there was this one cute girl I wanted to talk to to get her number and after class my opening line was going to be like, "hey whats up, this class is pretty hard huh? maybe we can study together or something" it was something of that nature but point is i was just trying to get her number

so we get out and shes walking and her friend catches up to her and I say my line, and she interrupts me and says

her: "actually no not really its not"
her friend: "yea i dont think its hard either"
me: (stuck trying to say something)
her: "yea its pretty easy"

then they get in the elevator and leave

lol WORST game I have EVER spat...

should have went all or nothing at that point.
you: so gotten laid recently?

[breakindrifts]

Lady at my work: It was nice meeting you.
Me: Thanks.

Some kid in a Honda: Nice car man
Me: Thanks
Him: Thanks.
Me: (laughing to myself thinking wtf)

Have a nice day
Me: Thanks

:owned:

[S13SilviaGirl]

At work one day I answer the phone...

I should say this: "AIMD Paraloft PR2 Speaking how may I help you sir or mam"

Instead I say this: "Strike Fighter Squadron 102, PR2 speaking, how may I...uhhhh shit. Sorry. AIMD Paraloft, how may I help you?"

[VROOOM]

well i work 2 jobs (at a ready mix concrete company and at sport chalet for the discounts and free snowboarding) and sometimes i work both jobs in one day. more than a few times i have answered the phone at the concrete company "thank you for calling sport chalet long beach how can i help you."
once it was the owner of the concrete company on the other end. there was a lot of explaining after that one.

[Revolver Ocelot]

A few times i have done this when answering the phone at work:
ME: "Plumbing department, this is Shawn."
.......I work at Best Buy now.

[HyperTek]

LMAO lol

that reminds me of this time when i used to work customer service @ k&n, and this new tech guy Leo answer the phone and he greets with the same greeting from his old work.. I was just soo cracking up lol

[wingsnthangs]

On the phone...

Me: Good morning, I'm calling blah blah blah... How are you?
Lady: I'm fine, thank you. How about you?
Me: Great, thanks, how bout yourself?

I guess some of my brain cells were still asleep.....

[txrxs]

PG13 huh...

[Scene: I'm providing clitoral stimulation to my girl with my fingers.]

Her: "That feels good, you really know what you're doing."

Me: "I play a lot of video games."

[SiI40sx]

PG13 huh...

[Scene: I'm providing clitoral stimulation to my girl with my fingers.]

Her: "That feels good, you really know what you're doing."

Me: "I play a lot of video games."

hahahaha are u serious????

[Slidin240Wayz]

PG13 huh...

[Scene: I'm providing clitoral stimulation to my girl with my fingers.]

Her: "That feels good, you really know what you're doing."

Me: "I play a lot of video games."

WHAAAHAAHAA..good one

in your head
1) ok lemme start with some super mario brothers
2) now to some street fighter
3) finish it off with some mortal kombat "break the diamond" challenge

ps the last sytem I owned was SNES and a PS1 my family friend let me borrow.

Carlos

[txrxs]

Yeah i'm serious, it was with my current girlfriend right when we started dating...we've been together for 3 years, so i guess it didn't scare her off.
P.S. I finish with the konami code, lol.

[WilloW]

WHAAAHAAHAA..good one

in your head
1) ok lemme start with some super mario brothers
2) now to some street fighter
3) finish it off with some mortal kombat "break the diamond" challenge

ps the last sytem I owned was SNES and a PS1 my family friend let me borrow.

Carlos
Hahah, how about the cheat code for Contra?

[S14DB]

Hahah, how about the cheat code for Contra?
That's the konami code.

[SimpleSexy180]

PG13 huh...

[Scene: I'm providing clitoral stimulation to my girl with my fingers.]

Her: "That feels good, you really know what you're doing."

Me: "I play a lot of video games."


LMFAO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[trsilvias13]

up, up, down, down, left, right, left, right, a, b, select, start FTMFW!!!!!

[Tenchuu]

well not a responce, i managed just barley not to say anything, but when i changed oil at wallmart for a couple of weeks these were the worst questions i got

(both from random hot college chicks)

i want you to give me a lube job

i need you to check my oil

it was all i could do not to give the responce that about 90% of most guys would have to those questions.

[WilloW]

That's the konami code.
Oh, I didn't even know.:smash:

[Ethix]

I work next to a Dunkin Donuts so I'm always in there getting iced coffees...like 2 or 3 per day. Anyway, I went into a Subway waited in line for like 5 minutes, looked at the menu and everything, and finally got up to the front and said "I'll take a large french vanilla ice coffee..." The guy behind the counter just gave me a confused look.

I've also done the "You too" thing before usually when I'm tired.


-Mark

[ManoNegra]

up, up, down, down, left, right, left, right, a, b, select, start FTMFW!!!!!

Contra for infinite lives IIRC.

[nsn240]

hahha i was at work a few weeks back... like 8am, im supposed to say
"hershey highmeadow campground this is mike speaking..."
i ended up with
"hershey highmeadow campground this is mike sleeping..."
apparently i didnt wake up yet

[S14DB]

Contra for infinite lives IIRC.
so late to the party... :duh:

[gotta240]

nsn240- damn those fruedian slips!!!! lol

[JDMark]

haha I remember in like junior high i said a your mom joke to a girl whos mom died of cancer i felt like the worst person in the world hahaha

and my first job was at movie theater i had to say the whole "enjoy your movie" line, like every other person said you too and walked away blushing haha. damn that was shitty job.

[S13Koop]

me: you have pretty green eyes
her: they're blue :Owned:
(she had big tits)

[s13silvia03]

This was pretty shitty, was hanging out with this girl and we were watching music videos, and an Alicia Keyes video came on...

Her: I heard she's a lesbian
Me: I dunno, can't you tell?

I didn't think it was too bad, but she got pretty upset and said I was calling her a lesbian...ended up being an early night.

[WilloW]

me: you have pretty green eyes
her: they're blue :Owned:
(she had big tits)
Its the damn big tits that always distract you.:smash:

[unwed_transient]

This one is really bad:

I worked with a girla few years back at a furniture store. Her fiance commited suicide via shotgun to the mouth. Pretty f'd up stuff was going on with all that.

Well I had a phrase I used commonly when something would go wrong, "I'm gonna blow my head off".

Well after this girl took some time off and finally came back to work. The FIRST day a bunch of us are all sitting there and something happened and I'm like "Ah, I'm gonna blow my head off". Her jaw dropped and she burst into tears and ran into another office.

Obviously saying it was an accident...
:Owned:


msglengthinabottle

[Mr. Camshaft]

Have a nice day
Me: Thanks

:owned:

Ha! I do that one all the time at work. It just comes out.

[s14dr1ft3r]

At work one day I answer the phone...

I should say this: "AIMD Paraloft PR2 Speaking how may I help you sir or mam"

Instead I say this: "Strike Fighter Squadron 102, PR2 speaking, how may I...uhhhh shit. Sorry. AIMD Paraloft, how may I help you?"
I've answered the phone, "Good Morning, USS Milius Radio Central. ET2 Shaw speaking. This is a non-secure line. How may I help you sir or ma'am?" The only problem was, I was at home. My wife (on the other end of the phone) could do nothing but laugh.

Back when the movie "Saving Private Ryan" came out, my younger brother and I used to make fun of it by calling it "Shaving Ryan's Privates". We said it so much that when my family actually went to go see the movie, my dad said to the ticket lady, "Can I get 2 adults and 2 kids tickets to Shaving Ryan's Privates?" The entire box office was cracking up, while my dad gave me and my brother the look of "you're getting your asses kicked when we get home."

[DrFtKiNg240sxy]

When I answer the phone at work I'm suppose to say: "Thank you for calling hobby people chino hills this is Jameson, how may i help you?"

But sometimes I like to change it up by saying something stupid like: " Thanks you for calling Jameson in Chino Hills, How may I help you?" I gotta keep myself entertained somehow.Haha

[theicecreamdan]

I always tell movie ticket seller people to enjoy my movie too. On purpose so I don't feel bad about it.

I usually tell hot waitresses to enjoy their meal too.

I know I've had my share of dumb responses but can't think of any.

[projekt_s13]

LOL very funny thread

[gotta240]

haha. Well, if we're talking about funny working lines....

I worked at Taco Bell in H.S. Unfortunatly(for taco bell) most of the people working there were good friends, and the managers "trusted" us alone... LOL.

We would answer the drive through in wierd voices, trying not to laugh. We would always ask if they wanted "special" sauce on their tacos. The best was when we decided to "close" the drive through at 5pm during busy dinner hour. Customers got PISSED. Needless to say, the district manager SOMEHOW found out about that one...lol

oh...then some people would order like two tacos. We would repeat the order back to them TOTALLY WRONG. Like "ok mam, so i have 22 mexican pizzas, 3 bean burritos, and 10 soft tacos." I know...retarded. but we had fun, and customers thought we were total dumbasses.

[trybal]

okay.. to start this off, im not a homophobe "spling" or anything, it just happened this way

I was hanging out with this chick i was feeling. and we were talking about one of the instructors she had. Well the teacher was gay.. litteraly and she couldn't remember his first name. She suggested it might be Richard, and it sounded right. So i said "yeah, its probably richard, any grown man who calls himself Richard instead of rich is probably gay, or at least it sounds gay." just a smart ass comment cause tahts how i am. Well she was alittle offended and says "do you really think richard is a gay name?, My dads name is richard"

:duh: i felt like an ass....


That was story one..

Another story

I was at work, "i work at my school" Well a friend of mine came up to me at work and asked if i would model for one of her dude friends, i said sure. Well he came up and talked to me said thanks, then asked me if i would be okay with modeling next to a girl thats topless. I was totally down with that obviously so i said "Hell yeah, im not gay, that would be sweet. I'm down for doing anything except butt sex" I have no idea why i said that but i did. Well as soon as he walked off my chick friend tells me "hes gay" Talk about embarressing and feeling like a dick:hammer:

[AN89HATCH]

Its the damn big tits that always distract you.:smash:

I remember a time at this cell phone place, the chick working there had yep big tits, so its hard not to look at. She asks me "So how do you like your service with us so far?" and me of course staring at them replies "looks good" haha then in my head I was like oops!

[SiI40sx]

now i KNOW for a fact you whore bags share this with me

"Hello?"

"Hi good evening may I speak with ???"

and its like 10a.m.... :duh:

[wickdmarz]

Man I started to tear up, some funny shiza in here...

I've done the "you too..." all the time.

I've called businesses asking for someone ended up like "Hi this is ::persons name:: may I speak to Marlyn...

Told my boss have a nice weekend instead of nice day on a Wednesday...or I'll say have a nice night but it's barely noon.

[theicecreamdan]

I hadn't heard the news that my boss at the time had just been fired and it was his last day. As I was going home I told him I would see him on monday, and then monday morning I had a new boss. DOH

[zaneithan]

mine has to be a couple years back, it was like two years after my boss lost his wife to a fierce battle with cancer and he's never been the same after that..well we were talking about how the next day was mothers day and i was like "ohh what'd you get your mother for mothers day Pete" i felt like such a tool for the rest of the week

[HKsilvia]

In gas station, a guy walk up to me and asked me how to get to Dublin, i tried to be a smart ass and tell him to turn left to go West on freeway, he kindly thank me but in stead he should go East on freeway, after i filled up my tank i tried to get back on freeway i saw him stopped on the freeway entrance because there was a signed say "to Dublin use E580" i drove pass him, didnt even dare look at him...

[FaLKoN240]

I was talking to this girl from my math class for the first time. I was really nervous.

She did a bunch of shit that was unattractive, so I lost my interest.

Last day of class she was like, "It was nice meeting you. Maybe I'll talk to you later?"

I was like, "Uhh, naw it's ok, have a nice. . .life. . .?"

Then I walked away.

[2iv0 sx]

ouch.. LOL

somymessagewasshortsowhat!

[woodchuck]

....Last day of class she was like, "It was nice meeting you. Maybe I'll talk to you later?"

I was like, "Uhh, naw it's ok, have a nice. . .life. . .?"

Then I walked away.

Cold, Cold, Cold! She musta done somethin REALLY unattractive to get a response like that. hopefully she didn't have any hot friends? :duh:

[Phlip]

Yesterday, I ordered pizza to be delivered, I'd just had the dog outside, and he did his "business" outside as he should have, so he was allowed free reign of the house for his deed, instead of being placed right back in his kennel.
Pizza man comes and Samson knows that someone is approaching the front door before anyone else does, dog hearing will do that for you. Pizza man knocks on the door, Samson barks, as small and non-menacing as a puppy can muster, being cute is a liability when one is trying to be intimidating.
I open the door, telling the pizza dude to step in, Samson approaches to try and smell his shoes, as he does EVERYONE entering the house and the pizza man looks a little reluctant to step forward. In a sweeping motion with my foot, I push Samson back, while saying "get back, you little black sumbitch!"
I then look up to see the pizza man's face BEET red, I found this to be doubly hilarious because Samson, being a puppy with black fur, is LITERALLY a "little black son of a bitch," see:
http://img64.imageshack.us/img64/5339/bsbde9.jpg
... was I wrong or something?

[S13SilviaGirl]

Wait was the pizza guy white? haha

[rainier]

this isnt really embarrasing but i sorta owned myself last night talking to my gf.

so were sitting in bed already just talking.
my ex calls and i dont pick it up in front of her.
she goes " shes prolly calling to tell you shes PREGNANT with your baby"

** note i "got" with my ex about a year and a half ago when my girlfriend and i were having a little "break" but my gf just thought we hung out

i go, "stuppppiiiiiiddddddd, thats IMPOSSIBLE, wait, how long ago did i see her?"

then she hit me plenty of times and i realized i should of said
"stupppppiiiiidddddd, thats IMPOSSIBLE, we never had sex."

PWNED MYSELF!

[JVD]

I used to be the phone guy at a chinese restaraunt. I would answer the phone(obviously), and get people their food when they came to pick it up. This happened numerous times.

Customer: ...Here to pick up for XXXXXX.
Me(after checking): It's not quite ready yet. Did you want to pay for it now?
Customer: Sure.
Me(after they pay, but still haven't got their food): Have a nice night!
Customer: WTF? Thanks?...
Me: Shit. Awkward.

We then both proceed to wait, at the counter, until the order is ready.

[irax]

hey rainier

where are the photos from the krispy cream meet?



Me: Hi id like to upgread my insurance policy
Insurance guy: sure, but why
Me: I got a loan on the car but once its paid off i wont need insurace
IG: why is that?
Me: well its going to be a track only car
IG: cool whats your plan?
Me: well its going to be a drift car
IG: ohh thats cool... you know we dont offer race insurance.
Me: yeah I know
IG: and we are going to have to do an investigation to see if you drift currently
Me: well havent done an event in while..

it gets worse

IG: well you know if you had insurance with us at any time and have drifted
we will cancle your insurance..

Me: FUCK!

[rainier]

^^ i needa go on my old computer n get em. or ask josh.

ill post em up somewhere if i find em

http://www.imagestation.com/picture/sraid71/pac68ed72b8a2af6fc0af8a018ca3cf87/fb927f5d.jpg
theres one of them before we got kicked off that lot

[FaLKoN240]

Cold, Cold, Cold! She musta done somethin REALLY unattractive to get a response like that. hopefully she didn't have any hot friends? :duh:

I didn't know what she was like at all.

So first she asked me to bum a cigarette off some guy I didn't even know.

(I hate smokers, and I hate cheap asses.) So I was like, "Uhh, yeah right. Get it yourself." Strike one.

Then she said something about she was not going to stay in Cali for long. Strike 2.

She said she was leaving for Europe. Strike 3.

I gave her the coldest shoulder after that.

[woodchuck]

^^ good man. i woulda done the same after the smoking thing.

[SpeedMonkeyInc]

Not me, but my friend. Not really even a response, but hella funny anyway.

Walking with my buddy and we round a corner and he nearly runs smack into this fat lady wearing a red sweater and he just blurts out "Woah Cool Aid!"

HAHAhah omg the chick looked mortified as well as my friend..... so damn funny

[bleachcola]

gf to me: im pregnant

me to gf: what are you going to do about it?

[ALTRNTV]

^
Hahahahahaha

[projekt_s13]

hahahahha nice one

[SpeedMonkeyInc]

gf to me: im pregnant

me to gf: what are you going to do about it?


Chuck Norris could not have done better.

Did you shake her like a baby then tell her to get you a beer?

[Team Rootbeer]

haha^ i loled at that.....
manly stuff, manly like....punching trees style manly

[cashmoney197]

i work at Old Navy, one time i awnsered the phone and said "Thanks for calling old navy, this is owasso"

owasso is the city i live in, i was so tired that morning

[S13SilviaGirl]

gf to me: im pregnant

me to gf: what are you going to do about it?


That's one of Chris Rock's only 2 acceptable replies to that situation. Now the question to you is, what are YOU going to do about it. It takes 2 to fuck.

[S14DB]

2? I thought the chick just lays there.

[Phlip]

That's one of Chris Rock's only 2 acceptable replies to that situation. Now the question to you is, what are YOU going to do about it. It takes 2 to fuck.
Lies!
One person is fucking, the other is "making love"

2? I thought the chick just lays there.
Speak for yourself, it doen't happen like that with me

[mrmephistopheles]

Speak for yourself, it doen't happen like that with me

He's speaking for other necrophiliacs as well.

[Team Rootbeer]

bwahahaha!! lolerz

[S13SilviaGirl]

2? I thought the chick just lays there.


We only do that when the guy jusst flat out SUCKS in the sack.

[irax]

white chicks just lay there, filipino chicks... omg crazy in the sack... while other asian chicks tend to just lay there, it has nothing to do with the man.

[Tenchuu]

white chicks just lay there, filipino chicks... omg crazy in the sack... while other asian chicks tend to just lay there, it has nothing to do with the man.


i would have to say that that is a blezeing generality, i've learned that there is no sterotype for wemen in the sack, it's an individual basis judgement.

[SiI40sx]

i would have to say that that is a blezeing generality, i've learned that there is no sterotype for wemen in the sack, it's an individual basis judgement.

indeed, sex is a universal language, really nothing to do with race, a freak in bed will always be a freak in bed!!

['90RPS13]

I got one:

Me and a few buddies are completely blazed out of our minds. We walk into a McDonalds and stare at the menu. The guy goes, "Welcome to McDonalds! How may I help you?" I reply, "Can I get a number 12?". "Well sir, we dont have a number 12?". "Yeah you do". "Sir, Our Menu's stop at #8". "Ah shit man, I'm sorry, can I have 2 #6's."

After that the manager and everyone just stared. Quite funny actually. Thank God I gave up the reefer. *a

As for the Filipino response, Yes, they are fucking nuts in the sack. My GF is a machine. *a

[kerosinek]

I got one:

Me and a few buddies are completely blazed out of our minds. We walk into a McDonalds and stare at the menu. The guy goes, "Welcome to McDonalds! How may I help you?" I reply, "Can I get a number 12?". "Well sir, we dont have a number 12?". "Yeah you do". "Sir, Our Menu's stop at #8". "Ah shit man, I'm sorry, can I have 2 #6's."

After that the manager and everyone just stared. Quite funny actually. Thank God I gave up the reefer. *a

:rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: I've had MANY impaired trips to fast food restaraunts. The worst is at Sonic.

['90RPS13]

^~~~ Do tell. *a

[theicecreamdan]

me and some friends were all getting drunk one night. and we saw a commercial on TV for sonic... and I was like "where the fuck is there a sonic down here?" well the interenet told us that the only close ones were in Anaheim, and El Centro. Well, from San Diego we decided to drive our asses out to El Centro for some Sonic, and we got there right after they started closing early. Lucky for us, they re-opened and we got our food. Totally worth the 2ish hour drive out there. Btw there was 3 people not drinking, so we had sober drivers, and it was a hell of a fun drive out there for the drunk passengers.

[S13SilviaGirl]

me and some friends were all getting drunk one night. and we saw a commercial on TV for sonic... and I was like "where the fuck is there a sonic down here?" well the interenet told us that the only close ones were in Anaheim, and El Centro. Well, from San Diego we decided to drive our asses out to El Centro for some Sonic, and we got there right after they started closing early. Lucky for us, they re-opened and we got our food. Totally worth the 2ish hour drive out there. Btw there was 3 people not drinking, so we had sober drivers, and it was a hell of a fun drive out there for the drunk passengers.


I think I ate at that sonic in anahiem...good shit. Luckily we were at my g-mas in huntington beach so it wasnt a 2 hour drive. bastard, that is another food place I miss eating. I hate you.

[breakindrifts]

hey rainier

where are the photos from the krispy cream meet?



Me: Hi id like to upgread my insurance policy
Insurance guy: sure, but why
Me: I got a loan on the car but once its paid off i wont need insurace
IG: why is that?
Me: well its going to be a track only car
IG: cool whats your plan?
Me: well its going to be a drift car
IG: ohh thats cool... you know we dont offer race insurance.
Me: yeah I know
IG: and we are going to have to do an investigation to see if you drift currently
Me: well havent done an event in while..

it gets worse

IG: well you know if you had insurance with us at any time and have drifted
we will cancle your insurance..

Me: FUCK!


:duh: :smash: Wow, you might as well tell an officer you street race on a regular basis if you get a speeding ticket.

Correct terminology for "track only car." Is "non operational" or for "display purposes." You dont tell them you are going to beat the shit out of the car and slip around in it.
thats hilarous.

[S13SilviaGirl]

white chicks just lay there, filipino chicks... omg crazy in the sack... while other asian chicks tend to just lay there, it has nothing to do with the man.

white chicks can be crazy....has NOTHING to do with race. Maybe the philipinas you are with have lower standards and actually dig you where as the white girls and other asian chicks have standards and you just don't uhmmm measure up to them?;)

[gotta240]

lol...burn...deep burn.

[SimpleSexy180]

white chicks can be crazy....has NOTHING to do with race. Maybe the philipinas you are with have lower standards and actually dig you where as the white girls and other asian chicks have standards and you just don't uhmmm measure up to them?

LMFAO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! oh my gosh <3 :Owned:

[SiI40sx]

(sarcasim) I-want-you-I-need-you-oh-baby-oh-baby

[S13SilviaGirl]

(sarcasim) I-want-you-I-need-you-oh-baby-oh-baby
heard that one a few times eh? hehe.

[NemeGuero]

You got offended by someone insulting you on the internet? Someone you've never even met?

You must really not be able to satisfy women if you get so defensive about it. haha

[mrmephistopheles]

wow thats a low blow there cunt... low blow....
Hope you enjoyed your stay here, but you really shouldn't have gone there. It was all in jest until you decided to take it personally.


and size doesnt determine stamina, and stamina means nothing if the moves suck.

Sounds like you have issues in the size dept then?
That's ok, avg is like 5 inches or something.
Penis size (and lack thereof) doesn't make you a better person though, as you've clearly demonstrated.

Don't worry though - I'm not banning you.. just -repping.
Lisa will take care of you when she gets home later.

See guys, that's how you please women.. by delaying your own gratification. :keke:

[NemeGuero]

by delaying your own gratification. :keke:

or you own. ;)

I gave you negative reputation points too. Welcome to ThunderDome, BITCH.


edited by Kevin: I didn't make a spelling error! NO WAY! YOU DID!! :squint: I'll kill you Nemo.

[S13SilviaGirl]

wow thats a low blow there cunt... low blow....

and size doesnt determine stamina, and stamina means nothing if the moves suck.


Wow, you seriously took that personally? Shit, then maybe I hit the nail on the head! hahaha. It was all in fun and games, you brought up race, and the fact that other women can't get "freaky". But eh whatever. I am not banning you yet. Oh and I may be a so-called "cunt" but this is one cunt that you couldn't handle, or hell ever even be within striking range of. Stick to your philipinas that make you feel like you're a man that can actually satisfy a woman in bed (or out).

[fliprayzin240sx]

Wow...filipinas are the only freaks in this world? What bout that one japanese girl in philly, that latina in lancaster, that puerto rican chick in jersey, that chinese girl from OC, damn i could go on with this forever...

[S13SilviaGirl]

oh and for the record, you dont need to make it a marathon, why drag out something that sucks?(hence a girl just laying there). If he knows what hes doing it dosnt have to be an all nighter. Hell and hour max would suffice. If he is well endowed, then that makes it all the better. But, even a little man that knows what he's doing can make even the biggest sex fiens get off. It is all about knowing what your doing, not how long you can last. Shit if I had a guy that was like the energizer bunny and yet he couldn't do shit for me I would kick his sorry ass off and tell him to go handle himself.

[Phlip]

wow thats a low blow there cunt... low blow....

and size doesnt determine stamina, and stamina means nothing if the moves suck.
Okay, one person can't take a joke anything other than personally. One admin, and his wife, the mod you decided to insult decided to let it slide, for now at least.

... I lack that kind of restraint, you take 3 months off, on me, and come back with a better attitude.
http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v108/S14DB/Posting/Smileys/bandance13.gif

[fliprayzin240sx]

YAAAAAY!!! Most embarrasing response yet...YOUR BANNED...

[HyperTek]

just happend 5 minutes ago..
this lady from Lowes calls for my mom, she isnt here so i take a message..

me: and what is your name maam?
lady : my name is Gay
me: did you say Gail?
lady: no my name is G -A - Y
me: oh ok.

[S14DB]

Hope you enjoyed your stay here, but you really shouldn't have gone there. It was all in jest until you decided to take it personally.



Sounds like you have issues in the size dept then?
That's ok, avg is like 5 inches or something.
Penis size (and lack thereof) doesn't make you a better person though, as you've clearly demonstrated.

Don't worry though - I'm not banning you.. just -repping.
Lisa will take care of you when she gets home later.

See guys, that's how you please women.. by delaying your own gratification. :keke:Just don't delay their gratification. Then you get your ass kicked.

[S13SilviaGirl]

just happend 5 minutes ago..
this lady from Lowes calls for my mom, she isnt here so i take a message..

me: and what is your name maam?
lady : my name is Gay
me: did you say Gail?
lady: no my name is G -A - Y
me: oh ok.


:keke:

haha funny

[A Spec Products]

I just asked a customer if he had a manual or a stick.

Then I said oops, I mean, do you have a manualmatic?

Sigh.

[j00ni3]

I just asked a customer if he had a manual or a stick.

Then I said oops, I mean, do you have a manualmatic?

Sigh.


hahahahahahaha nice one